angels_halo_shines

��Join me my journey, I write along the way��

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  • angels_halo_shines 4d

    #empathmind #empath

    I don’t know who needed to hear this. I realize I usually don’t write this way. It needed to be put out there. Thank you 🙏

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    Would/Will

    The $^*+ never, ever fails to amaze me.
    You know, people really hate me.
    The hatred is really deep.
    I am told.
    Eh well, I live my life,
    You live yours.
    My path can’t be yours.
    The way it goes.
    Yes, yesss I am mad
    I am set in my ways
    Please forgive me
    Or don’t
    Forgiveness is for you
    Not I
    For it doesn’t matter to me.
    If you hate me,
    So will the next.
    For reasons only they know.
    Mom,
    Mom,
    She told me one day,
    After I had it out with some donkey
    “Jessie, you know one of these days someone is going to shoot your ass.”
    Yes, it may be how I die:
    But, I said it once & I mean what I say
    You hurt my family then we have a BIG problem.
    I will die for my family.
    I will die for any one of them.
    I have family I wish it could have been me.
    To spare them the pain, for I am used to pain now.
    It shows no mercy.
    And I would take it all to free them.
    Many can say why.
    Many can say how.
    Whoever can question anything I have just stated.
    I will do it because it’s who I am.
    Who I have become.
    So, let your questions flow like a river
    I pay no mind to your petty judgement
    I have my own to tend to
    Until the day I take my last breath.
    For pain is one big test
    You can fail, you can pass
    The passage you find at the end may set one free.
    I’m willing to find out, if need be.
    If need be, one will find out.
    I say what I mean.
    I mean what I say.
    For actions speak volumes
    I have 1 fear and it’s no person
    It’s nobody.
    For being here has made me strong
    Street wise
    You show fear, you can take a bullet
    Or a blade
    I am who I am today, from my eyes
    Seeing all I have
    Soaking it all in
    Breathing it in
    Holding on to it
    Breathing it out
    For it’s not mine to hold
    It’s never been mine
    I take your pain
    I hold it in
    I do what needs to be.
    That’s all I know.

    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 5d

    Telltale of Your Soul

    How do you escape the pain?

    You live with it
    Let it burden you
    Allowing it to take over
    You are in control
    All the pain is just an illusion
    Illusion of what?
    Of your life
    The life you live daily
    With the pain so unbearable
    You don’t dare say a word
    For you don’t want to burden them
    So you try your best
    To hide
    You can’t you’re forgetting something
    Your eyes.
    The are the telltale of your soul
    Your pain, the illusion within
    The battles you have within yourself
    D A I L Y.
    ones. you. don’t. dare. tell. a soul.
    Yes, those.
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 5d

    In the quotations above they were taken from Yellow by Coldplay

    Photo credit myself ironically across from Jurado Lane (spelling matter be off.)


    #writersnetwork #yellow #empath #empathmimd #shine #hereinspirit #ceesreposts #song #coldplay #observations
    #sobernow #soberlife #spirit #spirtiual

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    Observing Your Observations

    “Look at the stars
    Look how they shine for you
    And all the things that you do”

    I know you see me now
    You see us now
    Up there with Mom laughing, it’s ok

    Observing your observations
    It never took you long either
    I guess now you see all you need now

    I told you I soak so much in
    You already knew that though
    You waited for me to figure it out

    The truth is, I never did on my own
    Only through LillyFlower I learned
    Thank God for her.

    “Look how they shine for you
    Look how they shine for you
    Look how they shine”
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 1w

    Really?

    One day, one could say
    Hey man, I will be ok.

    The next day, one could say
    Eh idk maybe I'll be ok tomorrow.

    Next week, one could say
    Idk when, I just know it's not today.

    I'm not ok,
    I'm not going to be anytime soon.
    It's ok, that's the way it goes.

    Too much taken away.
    All at once.
    Once something has been seen
    It's a part of you.
    You carry it.
    Good or bad.
    Memory, nightmare or trauma.
    It can't be taken back.
    No matter what how you figure it.
    You're left dealing with pain within.
    Wondering why me?
    Because, you could handle it.
    That's why.
    You can handle it.
    But, can we really?
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 1w

    It’s been awhile since I heard you laugh. Now I’m left in the silence of heartache. It’s not the usual type of heartache though. It’s a type I never felt before. I don’t know how to make it ease up. Or go away. I don’t think it will go away. It left my heart when you left this lifetime. I’m so very sorry, sorrow is not a feeling that anyone should have to feel.
    ©️angels_halo_shines

    Photo credit my daughter Molly Sue



    #sorrow #empath #empathmind #writersnetwork #ceesreposts #heartache #mominheaven

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    Sorrow Through & Through

    It’s been awhile since I heard you laugh. I’m so very sorry, sorrow is not a feeling for everyone.
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 1w

    “Don’t forget to sparkle!!” Is not my saying belongs to Tyler Mcdole. His husband & he do readings on tik tok & Facebook. I just love their energy!!! They make me smile.

    #sparkle #tyler

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    It’s been way too long, Miraquill/Mirakee & I. Too much going may be causing my mind to redirect. But, I don’t want it to do that. Well, maybe it will be better soon. I hope. Hoping all is well with everyone. Do shine on & don’t forget to sparkle!!!
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 1w

    Disgustipated comes from a Tool quote.
    Photo credit google images Maynard James Keenan. From Tool, A Perfect Circle ⭕️ & Puscifer.

    #empath #empathmind

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    Well when you try as hard as you can & you still fail. It brings a whole new outlook on what you thought you could overcome. Successful people have a sense of drive about them. Apparently, I was blessed with it. Just not enough of it. The joke was on me. Only I didn’t realize that until now. The light shines upon it, leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Disgustipated. Disastrous. I feel I failed myself. Time to try harder I guess. Smh. Try harder. What a damn joke. And I guess the joke was on me, at my expense.
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 1w

    The Mending

    Getting to know yourself it's an awakening experience in itself. Realizing old habits are hard to break. The realization you can't go back in time to a turn of traumatic events are then unseen. Trying so hard to coast through. Digging through the dirt on myself. Sifting through the aftermath of a path of self destruction. Wondering why, what if & could things have been different. Perhaps so or maybe not. My path has been knocked off course. I feel & know it has been. Whether I did it as an intentional sway of actions or a course of life forming unbeknownst to me.
    All the events taken place, recollecting the wish that I could use an eraser for the bad. Oh, but yes don't we all have some sort of willingly erasable moment.
    There is no amount of time to give yourself. As a healthy healing process, not on your own. Well, the contradictory statement I could be proven wrong. Just for the sake of it to be proven. Inspiration, it is slim to none these days.
    No concentration. No words to put together I suppose. Knowing all the while writing helps me deal with life. Every day events & occurrences. Only when my mind can mend together to focus. The mending never comes easy. The haunting of the memories eating me alive come to light. Hopefully, for the last time I ever need to speak of them again. I fear nothing. That's a lie I try to convince myself. To be able to face the outside world. Grown so damn frigidly cold & evil. Without hesitation will eat you alive if you allow it to. You can go on ahead & prove me wrong. I don't mind a bit.
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 2w

    Just run
    2 words,
    That haunt
    Taunting me
    Just run
    Let go
    Words flow
    Some glow
    Speaking volumes
    Showing me
    Pieces lost
    And so
    Am I
    ©angels_halo_shines

  • angels_halo_shines 2w

    Was It

    Lately I have been doing all I can do for me. Getting myself into physical therapy. Going to the psychiatrist weekly. And doing as much as I can with my family. My sons, daughter & my husband. You would think that would be enough to make me feel good about myself. It’s hasn’t been though.

    And then it all came together. I been off and on Facebook reading the news on there. Talking to some friends. Watching crystal sales. 🤓 I need to chill on that. But, then I saw how I been feeling. A friend of mine on there, she is a few years younger than me. Her face black, blue and swollen. And every color in between.

    A man, has done that.
    Another DV
    I know
    I know I can’t fix everyone
    Or maybe I can’t fix anyone at all.
    But, this has happened to my daughter.
    It’s happened to me.
    And it’s going to keep happening
    Men think it’s ok to hit a woman.
    And it isn’t.

    Then the cycle it then goes round & round.
    Your daughters grow up thinking it’s the way you live because she saw daddy hitting mommy.
    It’s not right.
    You want your daughters abused in such ways it’s mentally & emotionally they can never fully recover?

    Y’all need to wake the hell up & realize. Before it’s too late. One good hit & maybe she doesn’t get back up. Was it worth it?
    ©angels_halo_shines