brokengypsysoul

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♐Gypsy Soul bound by trauma chains ☯Finding herself again ☮Remembering how to write Trigger warning Mental health awareness

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  • brokengypsysoul 4w

    What hurts the most

    What hurts the most is seeing the change
    Questioning who you are now
    Wanting the old you back
    Doubting myself
    The shock of, my every day, my best friend, my loving partner
    To this cold, distant, uncaring person
    To be left on seen
    To be ingnored
    To have all the love and care disappear
    From everything to nothing
    From my person, I told everything, to the person who now knows nothing
    From the person who checked in on me to the person who didn't ask me how I have been
    From all-night calls to unanswered phone calls
    From being the one who soothed me to being my biggest trigger
    From feeling safe to feeling so violated
    From trust
    From feeling so loved to feel like I was nothing
    To feeling so empty, so alone
    So much love and happiness to unbearable heartbreak
    From feeling like you understood me to feel like you don't know me at all
    From sharing my feelings openly to getting criticised for sharing at all
    To feel like I meant nothing
    To feel like a burden, like I was 'too much.'
    From a future planned
    To no Happy Birthday msgs
    No Happy New years
    No, how are you doing
    No, I miss you
    No, I love you
    From everything to absolutely nothing
    That's what hurts the most.
    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 4w

    I just need time

    In time, I will get over you
    In time, I will forget about you
    In time, the pain will fade
    In time, I won't be reminded
    In time, I won't miss you
    In time, I will move on
    In time, these tears won't fall
    In time, I will stop loving you
    In time, you will become only a memory

    In time, I will put back together the pieces of my heart that you shattered

    In time, I will smile again
    In time, I will heal
    In time, I will find myself again
    In time, I will bloom and grow
    In time, I will be okay

    I just need time

    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 4w

    I don't need an answer from you
    Your actions (or lack of) tell me everything I need to know

    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 4w

    If you cannot see your light, LET THIS BE your light. I see your pain. I feel your fears. I hear you

    I know life is tough; I know it feels like the bullshit will never end.

    I know it feels like A LOT.

    I know your heart is heavy.

    I know you feel like YOU HAVE HAD ENOUGH.

    I know it feels like one thing after another.

    I know it feels like this pain will never end, that this bullshit will never end.

    I know it feels like things won't get better. But they will! They always do!

    Life can be so unkind; life can be so cruel.

    I know it feels like the whole world is caving in on you.

    I know that you don't think you are strong, I know you think you are weak, but here you still are, here you are STILL standing tall, still fighting! Still pushing through!

    You HAVE been through SO much. You DO deserve a break; you deserve life to be kind to you. You WILL get there; you WILL get through this; this WILL make you stronger.

    I SEE your pain; I FEEL your pain TOO.

    I SEE you, I FEEL you, I HEAR you.

    I see your pain. I feel your fears. I hear your cries.

    I am standing here beside you, offering my hand.

    If you cannot see your light, LET THIS BE your light.

    Things will get better, I promise you. You will become stronger, and you will be so proud of yourself for what you have overcome.

    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 4w

    I can't do this anymore
    How many times have you said that?
    And each time you get through it
    Remember this in those dark times

    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 5w

    Not meant to be.

    Goodbye my lover
    Goodbye my friend
    I wish you the very best
    These scars you can not mend

    I thank you for the time spent
    The memories made
    The lessons learned
    But with you I cannot stay

    I trigger you
    You trigger me
    We trigger each other
    We are simply not meant to be

    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 6w

    Just fuckin tell them!

    Life is short, don't hold back.

    Be honest! Be blunt! Be real! Be you!

    Say what you want to say!

    Tell them your heart's desires!

    How else are they going to know if you DO NOT tell them?!

    Why are you holding back? Are you scared? Because FUCK THAT SHIT! They are not mind readers; they don't know UNLESS YOU TELL THEM!

    You could miss a beautiful thing if you let your insecurities get in the way.

    We all love and appreciate honesty. We respect that shit! So do that shit!

    Do you like them? Tell them you like them!

    Do you miss them? Tell them you miss them!

    Life is so short; you are and will miss out if you don't speak up; you may miss out on the best thing you could ever have! You could miss out on unforgettable moments! AND if it doesn't go the way you wanted it to, AT LEAST, YOU WERE HONEST!

    Don't beat around the bush! This is no dance! This isn't high school!

    Nobody likes mixed messages!

    Do you know how easier life would be if we were all completely honest with each other? - SO much easier!!!!

    FUCK what other people say! This is YOUR life!

    FUCK what other people think!

    Live your life to the fullest with NO REGRETS!

    It feels SO much better when you tell them; It takes SO much more energy to hold this shit inside!

    If they do not appreciate your honesty, they aren't suitable for you IN THE FIRST PLACE! But you were honest, you were you, and YOU stayed TRUE to you!

    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 6w

    You make me feel sick

    You literlly make me feel sick to my stomach. These aren't butterflies - they are warning signs, they are red flags, they are giant FUCK right offs! My heart beats faster and not the good kind, the anxiety kind. My fight or flight responses are triggered, and to be completely honest - I want to do both simultaneously. ANXIETY! You give me anxiety. I am reading your words, seeing your actions, and I wouldn't say I like it; my gut screams at me; it tells me that this is wrong, my body shows me this, my senses are heightened. I am disgusted and disappointed. I know you. I thought I knew you. Who even are you? Why did I ignore these warning signs before? My heart is still racing. It's not okay. This goes against my morals as a person. Your actions are not okay. Everything in me is telling me that this is not okay, that this is wrong. I've felt this way before but never put it into words. Thank you for showing me who you really are, thank you for testing me, thank you for the hurt, thank you for making me feel sick to my stomach. Thank you for strengthening me, for showing this side of you, because I don't like it; I don't want to be a part of it; it makes me feel sick to my stomach. I thought it was hurt, I thought I was hurt, but no, I am disgusted. You are violating my boundaries; you are not showing respect, you are showing who you really are as a person, and I'm not too fond of that; my body is screaming out at me, yelling RED FLAGS! I am disappointed, not at you, at myself; I was only hurting myself. I wasn't angry at you; I was mad at myself; for allowing this to happen, for allowing you to take space in my head, for allowing you to manipulate me, for me to blame myself. For allowing myself to think it was me, and I wasn't enough. For me to put myself down and live in this pain and anxiety, for me to allow you to continue to take space in my head.
    I trusted you once.
    Now you make me feel uneasy, you make me feel unsafe. Now you make me feel sick to my stomach.
    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 7w

    You can't give me what I need
    I need to let go of you
    And accept that we will never be
    ©brokengypsysoul

  • brokengypsysoul 7w

    I wish there was a switch you could flick off the feelings.
    I wish I could scoop them all out of my chest and throw them away, all the heartache, pain and sadness, the anger and hurt; I want to rip it all out, im scratching and clawing at my chest, physically trying to relieve the pain somehow.
    The feelings are so intense and strong; I don't want them; the dark makes itself at home in the most bottomless pits of my soul, not wanting to leave. No matter how many tears I shed, the pain remains. I want to cut myself open and pull all the doubt, fears and worry out, rip it all out, bleed out of me all the toxicity.
    I don't want to feel this pain anymore
    I don't want my heart to ache this bad
    I don't want this ability to feel so deeply
    Flick that switch off - take it all away
    ©brokengypsysoul