#6378

634 posts
  • magikarp 50w

    Does this count? #unique_chall
    #6378

    Read More

    Marvelously Mundane

    There's nothing unique about me
    Not a bloody thing
    You see
    I'm an amalgamation of everyone I've ever known
    A seed in the soil watered by every passerby
    Until I've finally grown to the bud
    Containing nutrients from every drop of water
    That truly tried to nourish me so I could one day
    Blossom
    To the flower of all who grew me
    So you see I'm nothing more
    Nor am I anything less
    Than the collective efforts
    Of all who made me
    Me
    And I'm not the only one
    And I'm not special
    And I'm not unique
    And I'm just like so many
    And I'm just the same as you
    And you are just the same as me
    And that is so much more than okay
    It's beautiful and marvelous and simply unique
    Okay?

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 53w

    I'd Rather See Your Star Explode

    Eye've been standing stagnant for so long, and eye have no idea where it all went wrong, when eye became so weak. For the last ten years, though, eye know eye've lost the strength to speak with the me that once existed inside. Perhaps it started when she died and you chose to hide. Perhaps it's just me and eye'm unable to see there's no hope beyond the end of the rope hanging from that tree we once called our base. Eye do know that since you two went away so did every trace of my desire to even try anymore. Eye remember you telling me eye wasn't like everyone else just before your hand fell out of mine and our hearts fell to the floor. You told me eye wasn't just another shooting star.
    "...because you'll never burn out or fade away."
    And now these tears fall like stars in the city..every single night, but no one can ever see. And I promised I'd stay.
    Easy to make the promise, anyway.

    ©KAT☄️

  • magikarp 54w

    Just Breathe

    So what if I am my skin

    Scarred and torn and sick

    I'm still here

    Fighting

    I know what I am

    What I stand for

    I can hear

    Crying

    You are not alone

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 54w

    I've always had a love/hate relationship with nostalgia
    That I feel it for what I have never even known.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 55w

    Bubbles

    Seven hours on the phone, talking with a ghost. They tell you to stay positive, but we know better than most. There simply is no hope. You never stood a chance, well, except that one time you stepped on my foot while we danced. You stepped off quickly, apologized, then smiled and stepped right back on to both my feet.
    "You know, technically, I'm standing on top of the world." You whispered as you rested your head against my heart's beat. I felt the tears soaking my shirt, ran my fingers through your hair, kissed the top of your head.
    "You know this can't work. If it's what you truly want, just know I don't have it in me to fight it anymore." Is what I had said. You clenched my shirt in both your fists and pushed me to the ground, forgetting you were standing on my feet, and we both fell into a love that was damned to end from the start.
    The clouded, silver sky was the only witness to the love that was made and promise that was sealed upon that roof at 6:37 that misty morning: 14 July, 2009.
    So happy birthday, Britt. I told you that I didn't forget. I also told you that you'd go before me.
    God knows I'm also tired of being able to say,
    "I told you so."
    . . .
    Stupid head.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 58w

    The Day Jekyll Chose Hyde

    I remember being a child and afraid of mirrors because I was afraid of the monster I saw in the reflection.
    I remember being a teen and watching Mulan, crying, and wondering when my reflection would show who I was inside.
    I remember yesterday when I watched the live action Mulan remake and realized the mirror would never show who I am inside; because I am no one. Rather, it showed me what I was, what I am, what I always will be.
    I forever will remember this moment. For, it was in this moment I decided it was time for the outside to finally reflect the madness within.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 59w

    There are a few foul four-letter words in this one. Don't read if you'll be offended.

    #6378

    Read More

    Let Me Be Sad

    Yeah, I know I've been a little fucking crazy, lately. No, this ain't an apology. What have I to be sorry for? I'm only the monster you made me. You don't like it? Well fuck you. How about you go cry me and ocean so maybe you'd see; 'cause you have no idea what the fuck I've been through. You don't know a thing about these tears I've shed, the blood I've bled, or the nights lying awake wishing I was dead because watching the friends I've buried die over and again in my dreams is more than I can bear. No, no, no..yeah, you "get it" though, don't you... Don't you dare pretend you know what it's like to tell the same lie every damn day, justifying it with the fact that, in some sense, you actually are "okay" though not in the way they're asking. Keep pretending you know. Keep pretending, because that's the only similarity between you and me. We're both so damn good at pretending.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 59w

    Zzyzx Rd.

    Cut my wrists to feel the rain. It's hard to know where to stop when you're searching for pain and you feel nothing at all as heaven comes to call, but you've no words to say because you know you can't go, though you don't know how to stay.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 60w

    Eg(g)regious

    Though I had it figured out, life flipped the table and all my intentions lie shattered upon the floor like broken glass. Now all that remains are the slivers in my bloody hands from trying to put the pieces back together..
    ..but even all the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty back together again.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 60w

    ...I Have

    You ever take a look in the mirror, stare deep into the abyss of your soul through your hollow, hungry eyes, find that darkness you've been fighting your whole life to overcome just smiling at you - that darkness that knew all this time what you've finally come to accept - and smile back?

    You ever reach out to the darkness within with a hand so sure that when the darkness shifted and contorted, reaching back with tendrils of smoke and black, you didn't even shrink, nor flinch from shock as it simply held you?

    You ever feel dumbstruck at the fact the darkness made no move to pull you in as you'd always feared, nor beckoned, nor so much as tempted you to fall; merely waiting, ever so patiently, for you to do what you were dying to do so you could finally live?

    You ever pull that darkness in and become one with your darker side and all your sin so you could finally get off your knees and fight again?

    You ever smile at how much more terrifying a place the world now was with your demons unleashed; smile, knowing you had nothing more to fear, for fear had become of you.

    Well...

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 61w

    Frozen Oceans

    Blood may be thicker than water, but it was the torrential tidal waves of dishonesty, false pretense, and preconceived ideals, that crashed down with a roar and washed away the remnants of the oaths made in blood, dragging them out to sorrow-filled seas, full of the waste of countless sorrowful tragedies, with little more than a sibilant hiss.

    A lethal rush of poison bitterly trickling through the veins, delivered from a subliminally sweet kiss.

    A cascade of red overflowing from a single slash traced across the tender flesh of a wrist.

    A boon of knowledge overflowing from a brilliant brain, asphyxiating on the one piece presently missed.

    What is really known? What is really seen? What can be said of our own, individually iridescent, scene?

    ©KAT☄️

  • magikarp 62w

    ...and on

    Blood wells and slowly slips from the wound as water drips from the faucet and alcohol bites harder than the blade that opened the flesh to expose the tender light beneath so free and fresh. It's hard to explain the beauty in the pain when even those who know don't really know how to convey how it heals to slip into the cold and grey that bears a sombre serenade more comforting than any piece of love has ever made when love only grants peace in the form of shade that it leaves when it's gone.
    ...and on, and on, and on it goes.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    The Death Of Me

    I will not weep, for devils do not cry.
    I will not sleep, for there is no rest for the wicked.
    I will not heal, for monsters do not feel.
    I will not deal, for dreams are not real.

    I will disappear and fade into the hollows of my head and chest, wandering aimlessly while I wonder ceaselessly how such a hallowed life could be so warped and twisted.

    I will not return.
    For what never was can never be.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    Forever and Always

    Always said I was better off dead, now there's no denying it's true. I don't deserve to live, I never did, and I never will because I never can. That's just life, I suppose. You know, it comes and it goes. I've watched enough people leave this world behind, I'm happy to say it's now also finally my time. Sure, life is beautiful, the world is, as well. Unfortunately I've succumb to the ugliness of my demons and the horrors of my personal hell. There's no recovery for these wounds now. They'll bleed until the very last drop runs out.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    Razorblade

    Just a wretched waste of space trying to belong in this place forsaken and void of hope less than begging for help when love smiles with a "Nope." Crooked teeth and bloody nose and no one knows this is just how it goes on the basis daily worsening lately these words are useless as my resolve to evolve when love ceaselessly devolves from two to too much more than a simple bloody war. Like a joke shopping with wallet full yet still broke like a poor bloke with spirit stifled and choked by secondhand smoke from a cigarette's ashes falling like sand castles under waves of false pretense and duality. Breathe in and taste the poison filling you to the brim with the sweet sin of deceit burying you beneath six feet of dirty lies and abuse. What am I actually worth beyond these ashes and dirt that makes up all that I am when no one exists to disprove these lies that swim through my eyes.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    Sunburn

    Maybe it was too much. Maybe I believed you'd understand. Maybe it's time to hang up this cape. Maybe this hero's taken all he can take and it's his time to finally break. Loneliness is deadly, but no more so than love. It's strange to think these things could be found in the same place, yet here we are. I was once told that things like this won't last, that the brightest flames burn fast. I guess it must be true, because nothing burned brighter than you. So why am I surprised I'm left here where only ashes remain. I guess I believed that this time wouldn't be the same. It was naïve to dare to believe it was possible to touch the sun and expect to not get burned.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    Breathe

    What's the use in living when there's nothing worth living for. What's the point in fighting when no noble cause remains. What's the point in holding on when everyone is letting go. What's the point in trying when no one truly understands. Bleeding into these empty hands where all I hold slips through my fingers like the ever-flowing sands of time tracing a path back to before everything turned on a dime from love to war I can't fight it anymore this feeling of uselessness and pain is driving me insane and the harder I try the more hello just feels like goodbye because it's impossible to believe anyone cares when no one is there and the tears don't matter as the blood hits the floors and splatters leaving like the final breath fitting for this nobody with nothing left but a lonely death.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    A Hero Of War

    This is why I do not want to hope.
    This is why I do not want to believe.
    The moment the light breaks through is the moment I know it is about to leave.
    You put a smile on my face then leave me feeling like a wretch of a disgrace.
    This is why I stopped believing in love.
    This is why I swore to never again try.
    The more I bring you back to life, the more you pull me apart and bleed me dry.
    This is why I cry.
    This is why I beg to die.
    This is why I want nothing more than nothing more.
    This is why I wonder what is worth fighting for.
    This is why I always feel unwanted and used.
    This is why I enjoy the abuse.
    It is all I know and always on repeat.
    This is why I have chosen to accept my defeat.
    This is all I deserve.
    This is all I am worth.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    Bittersweet Memories

    You can't bury the past. You've got to dig that shit up and burn it down, then light up the ash. How could poisoning the soil allow room for anything more than discord to grow. You've spent your life feasting on those bittersweet fruits of the already tainted seeds you've sewn. There's not much left of you anymore, those demons have truly got the best of and you have left me powerless, there's nothing I can do when my words fall on deaf ears and you won't let them through the walls and barriers you've put up to keep the light out. You're robbing me of faith and replacing it with doubt. I don't know how much longer I can last when I'm rendered completely worthless by your past.

    ©magikarp

  • magikarp 64w

    Made Of Glass

    I remember the first time I was asked if that glass was half empty or half full. I didn't even hesitate to insist it was impossible for it to ever be empty. I was six. "Why do you think that?" My therapist asked me. I told her it was either full of air, water, or both. Always. Her response was so underwhelming, as though she'd been looking for a different answer.

    It took me until now to realize why.

    The glass was never there in the first place.

    ©magikarp