Focusing on anything lately has been such a chore. I drink cold coffee, grit my teeth and attempt to mine diamonds from the pressure. My eyes burn from the ashes of time lost. It's hard to stay on track when the shadows lurk just beyond the lanterns glow. Hands calloused from holding on too tightly, but we are all connected by threads invisible to our sight.
We shovel the muck and pick at the shiny possibilities that hold our attention. Sometimes we miss the gold in the cracks and reach for the glimmer of pain instead. There is beauty in pain after all. With every new fracture, we mend and grow stronger, or so I've heard. It has filled my vessel to the point of overflowing in the past, and it held me there in the darkness. Comfortable and despite my gasps, the toxicity was welcoming.
We have come to love it, I think. We lose ourselves in the tunnels of someone else's stories for a while and by the time we begin to realize we are deeply rooted and in danger, the way back is forgotten and the flame in the light is all but extinguished. There is no savior in these moments except our own minds.
I've been in those terrible caverns before. Screaming for the canary to lead someone to me, but there was no air to breathe. I crawled in the center of the world forever it seemed.
Suddenly a hand reached out and offered me a way out. A thread, a light, a home, a beautiful life. One where I didn't need to forge new roads or pull diamonds from my ears to pay for such luxury. Just the beating of my heart and a gentle touch. Who knew there was such incredible energy in real love and in my cold cup of coffee...