#adulthumor

5 posts
  • jlaine 28w

    I wrote this playful poem after viewing a tiktok video of a husband sitting sadly on the stairs as he watched his wife's family exchange Christmas gifts. Hope you enjoy! #adulthumor #adultnurseryrhyme #comedy #funny #poem #poetry #wod #pod #miraquill #writersnetwork #writersbay @miraquill @writersnetwork @writersbay

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    Dirty Santa

    As he peers from behind the banister,
    Bereft of all Christmas joy,
    He reflects on that very instant
    He chose not to purchase a toy,
    If only he'd gone with his wife
    On that shopping spree Black Friday night,
    He could have joined in the fun,
    A merry Christmas well done,
    Topped with Sprinkles McLovin all night.

    ©jlaine

  • violetpixie 137w

    Once upon a time we had a image of what we would be when we grew up.
    Adulthood happend and it bitched slapped you in the face.

    @violetpixie

  • tazmanian_angel 138w

    I recently decided to take an offer to manage a small motel, and it’s been interesting to say the least. So I’ve decided to vent with a bit of slightly dark humor.... I’m going to have to do a series of these! Lol
    #motel #hospitality #hospitalityindustry #manager #management #money #adult #humor #adulthumor #impatient #complain #street
    #vacation #maintenance #dirtysheets #shame #raise

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    Mo-tell

    “Excuse me, hello?
    I’ve got money!”
    Ding ding...
    “Room for two adults!”
    They impatiently ring
    Demanding the best deals
    Lest they walk out the door
    “The owners here know me
    I’ve been here before”
    Demanding to check out
    As late as they want
    “Oh you must be new here”
    They snort and they taunt
    It’s the first of the month
    And they all want first class
    “Give me the best discount
    Or else kiss my ass”
    Somehow they still bug me
    With non stop complaining
    Perhaps they’ll shut up
    If they get a good braining
    “This lady’s my wife”
    Yeah we all know she’s not
    If so, he’s her pimp
    Or he married a “thot”
    They check out one hour later
    Leaving shame covered sheets
    Then he dumps his “wife” off
    Simply wandering the streets
    I need a vacation
    Maintenance needs a raise
    I wonder how much these
    Girls make nowadays?
    ©tazmanian_angel

  • jlaine 150w

    Five Little Children

    Five little children dancing in the grass
    One fell down and bumped their ass
    Mama came running as they let out a scream and said,
    "No more children dancing on the green!"

    Four little children dancing in the grass
    One fell down and bumped their ass
    Mama came running as they let out a scream and said,
    "No more children dancing on the green!"

    Three little children dancing in the grass
    One fell down and bumped their ass
    Mama came running as they let out a scream and said,
    "No more children dancing on the green!"

    Two little children dancing in the grass
    One fell down and bumped their ass
    Mama came running as they let out a scream and said,
    "No more children dancing on the green!"

    One little child dancing in the grass
    One fell down and bumped their ass
    Mama came running as they let out a scream and said,
    "No more children dancing on the green!"

    Now no more children are dancing in the grass
    And Mama's left with five pains in her ass

    - jlaine

  • neverfinishesastory 175w

    Caught!!

    My face would flush red
    I would
    feel the heat
    radiating all over me
    making eye contact with them
    smirking
    but not stopping
    continuing on until
    the deed was done...