The Waiting and the Knowing
You say wait, but I keep asking when.
You say be still, but i can't seem to stop my constant fidgeting
You say trust, but my mind won't stop making backup plans.
You say ask, but I can't seem to find the words.
You say fallow, and i swear i am trying, but these pitfalls and devil snares keep getting the best of me.
You say listen, but lately I can't seem to hear you like I could before.
You are moving, I know you are, so why can't I feel you as strongly as I did back then?
I am holding on to the past feelings and memories of your power and goodness just to make it through the now.
How long will this next stretch of wasteland last, because my heart aches at the thought of it.
But I know you wait for me on the other side, so though my legs grow weak and my mind plans my undoing I know you will guide me.
I will sing, but I don't know how long my voice will hold, so when my mouth dries out, I know my soul will keep the tune and battle cry going.
Show me please
What I must give,
What I must do,
Who I must talk to,
Where I must go
Or how I must be to bring down whatever it is that is keeping you from me, oh God?
How must I die to myself so that I can live all the more for you?
I know you intercede for me by the second, so please, show me what I must let go of here so that I can be with you there.
I am desperate to stay the distance between us, being double minded never suited me to begin with.
Remind me of all I am to you my king;
help me to remember that you are my everything.
Remind me of our union and the beauty that there in.
And how your death and resurrection defeated death and conquered sin.
You are my all in all,
My creator and my friend.
My alpha and omega,
My beginning and my end.
You are my hope in life and death
My constant battle cry.
The great I am and the source of all my joy.