Tea is cold and grass is green, like every morning. Most of the mornings are lost in deciphering the dreams of my nights. Still waiting for that device which could record my dreams while I sleep, so that I can think about them during my evenings, rather than wasting my mornings. I just remembered that today is my first day of college.
Been thinking a lot about how different it would be from my school days. If movies are anything to go with, should be pretty fun. But movies just say the deepest desires of the writer. Sometimes it is good to be optimistic about the most random things in life. I choose the opposite for all the important things.
It is almost raining, almost. I really don't want to see the sun after the moody grey sky. Let the breeze keep on blowing till the end of the day. Less saturation on my days make them a million times better. Talking about million times, I am wasting my time again, which I promised myself not to, a million times.
A hot shower in this climate would make me fall asleep, yet I would like that over a cold one. I am observing the water droplets falling from my nose tip for no reason. I guess I am getting good at focusing. And all of a sudden, the dream of last night flashed in my head.
That airport runway is in my dream for not the first time. I remember the infrastructure like I built it ten times in the same place, which warrants no cause or reason. The same old runway with busy jets and empty cockpits. No passengers, no staffs, no ground team, no pilots, in short, no human in sight. I am sitting at the end of the runway just a feet away from the take off point. Every take off leaves the scent of hot rubber from the jet's tyres. If I had to sneeze when the jet is about to take off, I hold it in. Because I would bang on the tyres if I sneeze, I just realised that its is not a safe place to sit in the first place. And then..... oh my god! I am late..
Uff... made it to the bus stop twenty five seconds before the college bus showed up. As I climbed the steps, I was thinking if I rinsed my mouth after my breakfast? Oh no... did I flush the toilet after the poop? Well... I will get to know in the evening I guess.
Anxiety takes away attention to detail. Like the people I walked past as I walked in the middle of the bus to one of the empty seats in the middle. I have no recollection of their faces or figure. And that is when I thought about, if I was wearing my shirt right or inside out. A small heart-attack later I was fine, listening to Mr.Ballen podcast on my earphones. Its strange that anxiety inducing material calms down my social anxiety.
Well lord behold, the bus entered the campus. I am calm in getting down from the bus and never spoke with anyone. As I walked towards the main building with the name of the college, I was greeted by a girl standing there and telling everyone the direction to their departments.
"Welcome to Truman University! I am Sonia, head of student welfare union. A commerce senior. What is your name and department?"
Wow!!! a lot of words for a foot path interaction, I thought.
"Where is English?" I asked and I know that I did it really awkwardly...
"So human of few words huh? Anyway, you walk straight past the main corridor and take left. You fill find, Physics, Nuclear Physics and then English, that will be you."
I just nodded and made a small smile. Then walked on my while regretting not thanking her. Also my I was wondering why she could not just tell walk straight until you see English department? People who speak a lot are weird and I feel like they just talk a lot for the sake of talking a lot.
Here I am, my hopes of getting into the classroom before anyone else has definitely failed. Now I have to walk past at least fifteen people looking at me and I am obliged to smile and make eye contact with them all. Huh... that is Mouni! She was from high school. Good that I know someone here. What is the use though? She is such a bitch and I would have spoken a maximum of 44 words with her in our entire time in the same campus.
As I sat there alone minding mw own job of not making my presence felt, the first teacher walked in. This was a basic bla bla session held during every opening day. But as I was looking at the teacher, I had a feeling that I have seen her somewhere, but could not point my finger and say from where. After 45 long minutes of nothing, the class came to an end and we were walking out. As I was close to exiting the classroom, she called me.
"Excuse me dear!" "Yes, did you call me?"
"Well of course! Would you mind staying for a couple of minutes? I need to ask something."
Though her ask was of no interest of mine, I stayed just out of curiosity. We waited until the class was empty and she looked into my eyes and asked;
"Where do I know you from?" "Same... I am thinking and not able to remember."
"By any chance have you been to Willow international?" "What is Willow international?
This is not possible, that is my dream! Am I still dreaming? Should I try to wake up? But I am going to keep talking. Because now I remember who she is.
"Doli Pippin? The Mayor?" "Yes honey... Oh no! this is not good."
Then she just looked into nowhere and stormed out of the class.
"Mam.... Mam.... tell me what's wrong please...!
And there goes she, along with my first day at college. All the best sleeping tonight, I told myself....
parthavi_Wow...was this real or are you writing a story or something? If it's real...it's kinda scary. If you're writing a story then damn this is an amazing job!! Also if it's a story there will be more parts right?
partlywater@parthavi_ Hello there. Good to see you back here. This app is so bad now I don't wanna write here anymore. And yes, this is a story I am writing now. Please reach out to me @partlywater on Insta. I saw your comment accidentally when I opened Mirakee on laptop. So wanted to install app and tell this. I will send rest of my story personally. Cya later then
parthavi_Heyyy oh...so obviously I don't know when you're going to read this again now but I'm not on insta so won't be able to reach you .. It's cool tho if you ever decide to be here again I'll always be there to read:) N will definitely reach out if I join insta later!
I'm a traveller fighting his own insides, Floating in the empty space that is not nothing, Brimming with blithe, Like a star with no light, Wore to a frazzle yet alive.
So far away from home, Marching towards a selcouth land that has no name, In this sciamachy there is scintilla of eunoia, Where the blackbirds sing, And the clouds are pink, And lover's scent filled in my lungs, Guiding me, Though not all the way through.
Gray cold bedsheets suffering through rising moon, Dementia blooms, Sense of reality swiftly falling into the schizophrenic oasis, Paranoïa is comfort, If only it were a nightmare, Personal Gehenna gyving me to the very core? Ah I wish It's the sweet excruciating memento of the departed hour.
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