Pay attention to the fact that in each moment, your mind is commentating on everything.
You live in your own secret world, full of judgements of others and yourself. Full of analyzing, strategizing, and subconsciously protecting.
What exactly are you constantly protecting though? Nothing but an self-image. An identity that comes with a narrative of past and future, loss and gain, suffering, desire etc.
Free yourself from this identity and just be present. Root yourself in this empty presence and slowly your limited self-image will begin to fade, as you expand into a spontaneous, unpredictable, free presence.
You are only alive when you truly accept death. in each moment. When you consciously let go of your attachment to your body, to outcomes, to your life. Because you remember in each moment, the most overlooked fact: Everything you can see, including your family, friends, achievements, and even your body and mind, will soon be gone. The greatest blessing in life is to be constantly reminded of this.
Stressful situations, ruminating about the past, worrying about what might happen in the future.
These are mini storms that come, stay in your mind for a while, then leave. How big of a storm it is, and how long the storm lasts depends entirely on how much you entertain it.
The more you feed energy to these things (by thinking about them), the stronger and longer the storm. The less you allow your mind to feed these, the sooner they will starve and die off.
The only issue? All this thinking is mostly subconscious. When you're stressing about something or ruminating on something that happened, you get pulled into an almost literal 'train' of thought and 15 minutes later, you snap out of it and realize you've been staring blankly at the ground the whole time. Where were you for those 15 minutes? It's like you were just dreaming in your mind and then you suddenly wake up and come back to this moment right here, right now, aka reality.
As you practise pulling your attention back from these thought storms and just keeping your attention here in this moment, you will start to "snap" out of them faster because your awareness of your thoughts will allow you to catch yourself doing it, faster. And as you continue to do that, you will see that these storms have no power without your attention feeding them. You will see that they are insignificant and you may even laugh at yourself for being silly and taking these thoughts so seriously.
Continue to be aware of your attention and how it automatically wants to be carried away by these train of thoughts. And return your mind back to silence each time.
Bhudda was asked "what did you gain from meditation?" He replied, "Nothing. But let me tell you what I lost: anger, anxiety, depression, fear of death, insecurities."
Of course we have some limited choice. For example you can choose to read the rest of this caption or to just keep scrolling. But in the bigger picture, we don't really have control over other people or what happens in our life. If we did, then our lives would be "perfect" and we would only ever experience love and positivity. But obviously this is not the case since we are constantly experiencing things that are painful/undesirable etc. Because we don't control life. Matter of fact, we don't even have control over our own thoughts. Do you get to control what you're going to think about throughout your day? No, thoughts just randomly pop into your head.
Those who observe closely, will see that Life takes care of life. An incredible inner peace comes from this. I wish this peace upon you.
The Divinity of life is always present. In each and every moment. What is the only distraction to this? Your attention is constantly focused on something else. Constantly focused on this little voice in your head. that doesn't ever stop speaking, analyzing, critisizing, or thinking.
Speaking in- and simultaneously listening to- this little voice in your head, is the only distraction.
Consciously take your attention and interest away from thinking in this voice, and simply be here with a silent mind. This voice is a very quiet, subtle voice that 99% of the time you're not consciously aware of. It is this voice that you are constantly talking to yourself in. It is this voice right now that is reading this. What percentage of the time are you aware of this voice? And how many seconds of your day is this voice silent? Pay attention only to this for a day. and you will see that keeping your mind silent for even 10 seconds is almost an accomplishment.
But what's so special about keeping a silent mind? Why do the masters of all the true paths speak of this silence as being incredibly profound? Because every time your mind returns to silence, it instantly returns your attention to reality. in this moment, right here right now. You become instantly alert, awake, alive. and your patterns of thinking and behaving are slowly exposed by the light of this conscious looking.
It is this conscious looking that reveals to you the character you play. As it's observed, your self-image starts to falls away and nothing is left but your conscious/alert awareness right here right now, that silently and spontaneously exists in each and every moment. This. is the source of wisdom, the source of joy + gratitude, the source of love, the source of creativity, and as you may soon come to discover, it is the source of life. Life cannot exist without awareness.
What is the ultimate goal of your spirituality/path?
Let me know in the comments: what exactly are you trying to achieve with spirituality and why? What's the root of it? Let's look into this.
"Spiritual" people are often those who notice the superficial things of society and see that we are all wearing masks, so they seek to be better and "higher" than this. If this is you, you probably can't stand the constant, pointless small talk among people. The lack of authenticity, etc. This can make you feel alienated - if you're not one of them, then who are you?
Well most people find solace (as I once did) in being spiritual. Buying crystals, talking about the universe, kundalini energy, the law of attraction, debating religion etc.
Then as you grow a bit wiser, you realize that mental concepts and talking about them (no matter how "woke" you consider the concept to be) is the only thing preventing you from directly observing and experiencing reality- which only exists right now. Mental concepts are the only thing in the way of you being in touch with the silent source of creativity and wisdom.
As you start to shift your attention from talking about concepts to observing your thoughts and behaviours, and keeping your attention in presence, that's when true learning, creativity and effortless compassion starts to happen. It comes spontaneously, from silence.
It's also when you start to see that your identity/personality is only a reference to past behaviour/thinking that you choose to carry with you in your mind and identify as being "you". Personality has no real existence in the present moment - other than your belief in it. You get to see that for the majority of your life, you thought you were this character, this personality.
And when you begin to see that a self-image cannot possibly represent what you are, your identity feels like it's in a freefall and is desperate to grasp onto something you can identify with - scared of being empty, nothing.
And when you start to acquire more spiritual information, practises, concepts, friends and quotes it gives you something you can hold onto so that you have some foundation or idea of who you are. In reality all that has happened is you went from one self-image to an even stronger sense of identity than before (which in reality only takes you further away from the truth).
You're trying to be a human being having a spiritual experience, when in reality you are a spirit having a human experience. So tell me then, how can anything you do or talk about be spiritual or not?
Stop trying to be spiritual and just be. Your true being has no personality, it is simply just your awareness in each moment. Don't let thoughts, concepts, or talking distract you from this. And you may come to see that the awareness in your body cannot be yours because it is not personal.