It is one thing to be right about a thing or a view and yet another things to make others having conflicting views be able to see that they are wrong and be willing to change their thoughts and this is where love comes in. You could be right about a matter but rebuking the other party might make him/her not listen to you or act accordingly based on your approach towards correcting him/her.
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. #Proverbs15vs1
A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it! #Proverbs15vs23
How do we correct with love?
In order to correct with love, we must be willing to practice patience and not give ourselves to wrath or malice when our good act is turned against us or the person refuses to listen. We must also bear in mind that the reason we are correcting is not to prove our knowlegde on the matter but to make the other person come to zone of understanding that he/she is wrong but can be right.
A case study for this is the person of Apostle Paul while in Athens (#Acts17vs16-34). He discovered that the nation was full of idol worship and his goal was the bring them to the knowledge of truth, Christ. He was given the platform to speak and he started by constructively criticizing them as they worshipped what they no idea of (TO THE UNKNOWN GOD) and went further ahead to tell them about God and the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Many chose to not believe him when he spoke about the resurrection but some did believe.
Looking at this context, Apostle Paul could have chosen to insult their ignorance, blast them and fail to talk about Christ. Instead of focusing on their weaknesses, he chose to focus on what would become their strength if only they chose to listen and be converted.
Never forget, you correct others to bring about change, not to magnify yourself; when you choose this path, then have you chosen to correct with love.
In your desire to help others in Christ, don't go about unearthing secrets faults which could result in you falling into that very sin.
Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. #Galatians6vs1
In all, our words may not be enough to cause a change of heart. Your prayers for that brother or sister will go a long way, don't relent.
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. #James5vs16
19 Brethren, if any of you do err from the truth, and one convert him; 20 Let him know, that he which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins. #James5vs19-20.
A lady Who suffered greatly, Yet her sorrow never overcame Her love.
She gave herself To God and man; Scotland was her birthplace, But Calabar was her home.
She left comfort And family To fight for love In the midst of hate and chaos.
She never married But had many Children; She was the mother To the rejected.
She stood her ground; Defying customs and traditions That men may know Christ And be saved.
Even when old age failed her, She never relented; Rather she progressed The more.
Her life Turned stony hearts to flesh. Though she lived in the midst of great evil, She walked in love.
She allowed nothing Stop her from loving God and men; And even on her deathbed, She died with love in her heart.
-Mary Slessor, An Epitome of Love-
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth. *1John 3:18* .
Mary Slessor stepped on the red earth of Calabar when she was 28 years, and served its indigenes for a great part of her 67 years on Earth.
What drove her from Scotland to Calabar? Was it a desire to be famous? Was it for tourism? Was it enforced on her? NO! What drove her to Calabar was her love for God, that even at old age when her body failed her, she did not relent rather she chose to continue her work for God that many not few might be saved. She never married yet had kids around her; she adopted and catered for the rejected. She left the comfort of Scotland and chose to dwell in a mosquito infested land. The only thing I know that can make anyone dare such is "Love and Selflessness" and that love was not veered towards personal gain but towards men and God.
She possessed the supernatural strength of unreserved love not for worldly gains but for men and God. Oh that God will bless men and women in this generation with an heart of unrestrained love for kingdom purposes who will be willing to give themselves wholly to eternal pursuit in Jesus name, amen.
Life is like a race with hurdles and these obstacles comes in varying forms and height for different individuals but what matters most is how we choose to respond to these obstacles. In a hurdle race, it would be abnormal for a racer to he seen crawling underneath the hurdle and yet a devastating finish for whosoever allows the hurdle to prevent him from getting to the finish line.
Pertaining to life circumstances, these hurdle could be based on the physical, psychological, or financial aspect of our lives; which could seem to prove a barrier to our growth. I want you to bear in mind that it the challenges that make victory sweeter. Whatever you are doing either small or big, don't seek for way to run away from the challenges but rather seek for strength to overcome them and this in various cases might require you walking alone. Personally, I consider believing in yourself as the first step to achieving anything you hope for; endurance and perseverance is key as you stride along.
These hurdles also appears in our spiritual lives in form of doubts, fear, trials, sins, persecution, and the vanities of this world. However, these hurdles should not be seen as being greater than what we can surpass for God has promised that He won't allow us to be tempted above what we can handle (#1Corinthians10vs13) and He would be with us as we draw near and submit to Him, and resist the devil. Always bear in mind that this race is not an endless one, although more lengthy for some than others. There would be difficulties, tough times but then these are the times you have to 'be strong and of a good courage', but how can we be strong or even summon courage when our strength faileth, our knees are wobbly, doubts already preying on our thoughts? #Hebrews12vs2 says 'Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith;', for Jesus indeed gave us a potent example to follow; when He was at the point of breaking down, He encouraged himself, went to the garden of Gethsemane and prayed (#Mark14vs32-36) bearing in mind that 'by strength shall no man prevail' (#1Samuel 2vs9) My beloved brethren be willing to run this race to the end, bearing in mind that God will be with you, His grace is ever sufficient and His strength is made perfect in our weakness as long as we hold on to His will and do as He commands. Run, knowing that Jesus has gone to prepare a place for us (#John14vs1-3) and is willing and ready to receive us as soon as we get to the finish line.
But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved. #Matthew24vs13.
For we are made partakers of Christ, if we hold the beginning of our confidence stedfast unto the end; #Hebrews3vs14.
If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. #2Chronicles7vs14#KJV
But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. #Romans5vs8#KJV
I am crucified with Christ : nevertheless I live ; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me : and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. #Galatians2vs20
In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him. #1John4vs9
Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions. #1John3vs18#NLT
And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. #Mark12vs30
And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these. #Mark12vs31
No one told us What urges was going to look like; I guess It is hard to explain.
When it came We were caught unaware And we made mistakes That could be avoided;
We failed But ignorance Is no excuse For falling into temptations
I guess Our belief in God Wasn't strong enough To prevent our fall
Now we know Our wrongs, The ball Is in our court
Do we still follow Our wrongs Or change Our path?
Urges are part of our human lives but following the lust that is associated with it doesn't glorify God. Make sure you glorify God with your body and thoughts.
For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; #1Thessalonians4vs3-4
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. #Romans12vs1-2
There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it. #1Corinthians10vs12
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. #Philippians4vs8#KJV
LOVE, a four-lettered short word which has a range of meaning. It's the bond between a child and its parents, it's the mutual trust and care amongst two friends, it's the feeling between two which connects them on a mental, physical and spiritual level.
It can make you feel a lot of emotions too. For some, it brings a smile on their face, for others, it brings tears in their eyes. Some feel butterflies in their stomach, some just give a sad short smile.
And then there is this feeling which most of us confuse with love... Obsession. There's a fine line between Love and Obsession, and most of the times we don't know on which side of the line we are standing.
OBSESSION, is dangerous, not just for the person one is obsessed with but also for the one who's obsessed. It is not limited to just partners, it can be among two friends too. It takes these emotions further, causing a person to fixate on their "loved" one as though they are an object or possession.
For some people, these feelings can become so powerful that they start controlling the person they love. It may appear that they worship their partner at times, but become angry or jealous at the slightest threat. One starts to put their needs, physical or emotional before their partners, sometimes even harming them in the process.
Real love requires compromise and negotiation, while obsessive love demands that the other person submits to the demands. Real love prioritizes the other person’s well-being, while obsessive love may involve physical or emotional abuse.
And then comes the people who just love being in love. They don't care about what the other person feels, whether it's love or just care, they just want to be in "love". They get attached very quickly and expects the other to feel the same. They confess their feelings within days and get extremely obsessed. This might be between two friends or something more, either way, it's equally dangerous.
So next time you think of confessing your love... Stop, take a step back and think. Do you love that person or are you just obsessed with them or do you just love the idea of being in love?