[They thought he was broken and socially unfit. He himself thought being an unfitting Piece in the Jigsaw. He was like everyone, still different in some Ways. He didn't know how to explain, they had no Skill to understand. Though most mistook "different" as "bad" and "defective", there was one Fact no one could figure out: How being different is unique, how Uniqueness stands out, and what stands out captivates.]
If you encounter this letter anywhere in the future, make sure you have successfully worked on something you have been working on for years. In case you haven't, then take it as guidance for life.
I do comprehend that you need attention and love, someone to rehabilitate your broken heart that often got broken into a thousand pieces with no chance of fixing. You always needed someone who can accept your past respectfully, push you live the present you've always desired, and encourage you see the future you've always wanted.
You always ran for attention, and mostly fell into the hands of the people that made you feel worthless, treat yourself as unimportant, devalue you to nothing, and convince you that you deserve no happiness and care. It wasn't your fault, but you badly need to disconnect from the toxicity that spoiled you. You deserve better.
I don't know if you still have zero friends and have never been in a relationship yet, I know it's hard to trust people, but believe me, it's still better than seeking attention from people you don't deserve to have in your life, the ones who'd ruin your life for you and leave you alone to fend for yourself.
Despite the Earth having its share of cruelty, there are good people out there, you just gotta find them wisely. Eventually, you'd get a caring partner and some loving friends; if not, then fall in love with yourself, search for a friend inside you; just don't live estranged, from yourself.
I hope one day you'd stop incessantly looking for attention, especially from the wrong people.
[All these years all where I put myself were in the hands of the folks who devalued me in their best ways possible and vanished forever; me, left deserted, isolated, repairing myself, gathering myself pieces by pieces, like aggregating roses into a bouquet. Years passed and I'm still building myself, an incomplete me, still looking for the remaining myself.]
[What's the purpose of life and the meaning it possesses, inquiring an answer to it is nothing less than playing with Lego blocks. You set a foundation you create a model, it may in the end look like a systematic figure or a weird masterpiece, and you always have a chance to make and remake; you can hurt yourself by stepping on them but there's no impossibility to recover. All you learn from the experience is that the meaning and purpose of life was never handmade to you; ultimately the ball to orchestrate the life, is in your basket.]
[Our similarities in culture, felt like we were siblings or cousins, my nativity was in the state above and the destination in the state below; we were divided by the state border, yet connected to the same sea and the transport routes connected the dots like nothing. My deep desire to experience the blend of nativity and influence, learn the language and vibe to the regional music, can't let my 'Konkani' pride to die easily, and all I had wished was to find there a shelter someday, and feel there like home. Panaji and Madgaon, if you're listening, I can't wait to step on your soil.]
[I often took 'pride' being the 'flawed' one, if I leave one day, I won't want my buddies to remember me forever, if I still live in your minds, then please remember me more for my 'pride' than my 'flaws'.]
[At times in public I act crazy, like I'm a part of some wholesome music video, and the camera is all panned on me.
The kind of a wacky happy bloke it transforms me into, to be free in my own damn world all I do is to try hard grinning, so much that even my mind teases me, "Boy you look like an idiot when you smile so brightly."]