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  • justmywords 260w

    Her most frequent lie
was not told with words,
but instead, tucked gently 
behind her smile.


    ©justmywords

  • justmywords 261w

    I've been missing you a lot lately.
Maybe it's all this rain, or the songs this radio station keeps playing, or the fact I keep hearing your name. Or the picture of us I found the other day? Maybe it's because I have never gone this long without some kind of message or call from you, telling me things I already knew because you never were shy about taking a selfie or two...thousand.
Just like you were never shy about making it your personal mission in life to make everyone and anyone smile. You went out of your way for strangers. And as friends, I always knew as soon as I asked, you would do whatever it was I needed you to, because that was just...you. I still have yet to find the right words to describe just how much I want to talk to you, to hug you, to tell you I love you just one last time.
    ©justmywords

  • justmywords 261w

    How is it that this moment in time which completely change my life, is something that you don’t even remember? It probably is not something that ever even registered as important, but still, after all these years, it is something that I still think about at night. I dread the oncoming rush of feeling, the shame that saturates my mind, it drowns me in this place in time in which I have absolutely no control over your thoughts or my own, I am helpless to change anything that has happened since, and all I’ve ever known is this ever strengthening desire to escape, to be far from this place I lie about and call home, to be forgotten, to be unknown, let go, to disappear, start over, where I can be me without the memories of when you stripped me of all the innocence I’d ever known.
    ©justmywords

  • justmywords 262w

    And just like that, you pull me back,
A few words, a couple lines tethering me to you, 
Binding me to a memory I keep trying to erase.
Are you afraid you've been replaced? 
Are you afraid I will forget that moment in time I most regret? 
No, go ahead and remind me. 
Remind me why it is I can't sleep at night and why seeing you smile makes me cringe inside, why a grown woman wants to run and hide, cowering inside a closet. Do you even realize, are you even remotely aware, that on that day your name, for me, became synonymous with that nauseating tidal wave otherwise known as shame?

    ©justmywords

  • justmywords 262w

    I do not go weak in the knees at your smile;
    your smile gives me the strength to keep moving forward.


    ©justmy.words

  • justmywords 262w

    "The One"

    Perhaps if we put less time, thought, and energy towards finding "the one" for us and instead, focused our efforts on being "the one" for someone else, we might find our lives to be just a little bit happier.

  • justmywords 263w

    Fire.

    I opened my eyes and stared at the dark ceiling, that didn't seem quite as dark as usual. It took a moment for my sleep intoxicated brain to name what that odd smell in the room was,
only a moment before it took my lungs to register the sudden drop in available oxygen. I was strangely calm, rolled to the floor. 
You were gone, like every night before. 
I crawled to the door, red and orange flames licked under it and I backed up, overwhelmed by the heat. I hurried to the window, threw it open, hoping, somehow, your arms would be there to catch me. The sudden intake of cold night air choked me, my world spun in even slower motion. 
I looked out and was suddenly aware that you were there, 
standing on the ground, staring at our burning house, 
just watching. 
You made no motions, no sound, you did nothing. 
Your hands were not reaching forward or anything,
rather, one held a lighter, and the other, a can of gasoline. 
I always knew, somehow, 
your love of fire 
would be the death of me.


    ©justmywords