"I'm only a man, in a silly red sheet, digging for kryptonite on this one way street."
It's No Longer Under The Bed
Darkness falls from the sun this day. As I'm burned by the sorrow of each blackened ray I recall my promise to stay in this wretched world when I solely wish to fade away. To be invisible as that dark light that embraces me with more despair than the blackest night.Colder than any rainfall I've known, than the snow I walked in alone, than being naked in front of all in whom a seed of love you've sewn, than the feeling of accepting I am grown..older.Mayhap it is my time to fall in line and give up all I am to be the rest instead of continuing to do and be my best when being anyone other than me is the only way I'll ever be even just fine. I'm tired, mired in this bog full of fog from the events that have transpired since the moment I first drew breath. Tired of breathing, seeing, hearing, writing.I need a millennia long nap.©magikarp
Smile with your eyes and lie through your teeth.Everything is okay, no one really cares, so keep it brief.Distract them with your hands and slip through the cracks.It doesn't really matter 'cause they're not really keeping track.Thirty years it's been, now, what have I become beyond some broken, lost, damned nothing, come from nowhere and going increasingly numb. I have learned more than I can recall, but I can't find the way to let go of all this painful aching from an unbreakable heart that's never stopped breaking since the day I said goodbye and started questioning why it was you who had to die and I couldn't take your place when to this very day I've been nothing more than a dreadful disgrace of a stain that stands out on this already filthy planet. And I promised I'd learn how to cope but I'm sorry I haven't and it hurts all the time even thirty years passed and I'm screaming inside for some sort of sign that I may know how long this will last,because I am tired.So, so, so very tired.Of hating myself, what I have done, where I have been, what I've become, where I am going, for always knowing; always knowing I can never ever forgive myself for this thing that was beyond my control. So what if we were only four years old. That should have been one of the days I was there with you, playing on the shore, getting sand in our shoes, riding in your little Barbie Jeep, making promises there was absolutely no way we'd be able to keep 'cause we'd just forget. Then, maybe, you could have gone home with your mom, and she could have kissed you before you went to sleep, praying the Lord, your soul, to keep, instead of feeling the emptiness of her arms at sunset. And I would be where you are now, watching over you, smiling down, thanking God it was me He took, and let you continue writing your book. Yeah, the story of your life would have been so pure and bright. Unlike my dark, morbid, twisted tale of agony, misery, despair and tragedy. You see, no matter how hard I try or lie, I just cannot see the light. And every single time I lie to sleep I hope, above all else, that to be the last day I see.It never is.I just want this to be over, but it plays over, and over, and over, and over. This is not a life, it is a joke. This is not living, it is mirrors and smoke, and I am a magician. Oh, how I put on such an entertainingly deceitful show. Pull a rabbit out of my ass? Sure! How do I do it? Hell, even I don't know. Alas, it has been thirty years and I'm running out of tricks, though not a single one could ever fix this godforsaken wretch I am, and I'll keep on going, even though no one is showing, because stopping is not something that I can.But, oh, how I wish it would,what I wouldn't give if it couldjustend.©magikarp
There's blood on my hands and a heart on the floor where the person I once was stands a shell eroding forever evermoreA space in my mind where nothing's all I find beyond the breeze singing through the trees of pinned up memories fading like ships sinking beneath calming seasThe mirror smiles as I walk away from what I can never know to accept my life as I am heartless hollow as the relentless cycles of day and night never-ending indifferent to all but what is©magikarp
"Oh, we learn that love is supposed to win--but, sometimes, it's the demons that are standing in the end." - Parachute
Breaking A Brain That's Already Broken
We were wanderers, searching for a place to stay until you tripped and fell into your grave. It was a deceptively bright and sunny day, kind of like today, not a cloud in the sky, bit of far-off haze. A memory I'm trying so hard to save. Still, it's slipping away. The sound of your voice, curve of your smile, scent of your cologne, colour of your eyes fading to grey. The trees still dance and the wind still whispers your name as it gently caresses the leaves. The sun a gentle slap on my face - when I'd start losing grip you'd slap the sense back into me.Brother.I need you, your guidance, support, and grace. I need you to remember what we were fighting to be. All I see anymore is everything but the way forward and walking through the dark isn't at all frightening I still carry my sword but I've no compass no way to know which way I should go when up and down are options as well like heaven seems nice but I'm far more familiar and comfortable with hell and back there has so much simplicity because it's already done but up there is hope and potential for more battles that can and will be won.Victory.But what even is "victory" really...©magikarp
The Cup II
Twelve years with my head in my hands, thinking, experimenting, pondering, relentlessly, yet I still don't understand. Nevertheless, herein lies what I had learned.The cup was never halfway anything - full or empty. That cup has always been full of both water and air. Some substances we can see, others we cannot, why should that mean they aren't there? It's no less maddening. Does it only fill halfway with visible substance to show there exists that which we cannot see? Is it meant to be revelatory? Is it meant to teach us about what exists within us? Is it simply to induce insanity? Is there no reason? Is the reason irrelevant? Does it matter if we understand the matter, or is all that matters is that there is matter?'Round and 'round in the head of this overthinker it went for those twelve years. Finally, I had to accept that, of all I could learn and understand, in spite of all I can and will ever know, I have to let that one thing go. It will forever be out of reach. The one thing I truly care to know and understand, and I can never. Not in this life, anyway.It's been two years, one month, eight days since I came to this realization. Where is that cup now? Shattered. Its pieces and contents littering the floor as the thoughts once littered my brain. I gave up for the first time the night I accepted that reality. An open door I can't seem to close. It's so easy to give up on any and everything, anymore. And I hate it. What I've let it do to me. What I've become.©magikarp
The Cup I
No matter how much I fill it, the cup is only ever halfway full. I can look inside and see substance, but it's still always halfway empty. I pour more and I watch as the substance within stays leveled. They pour more and I watch as the substance within remains static. In my confusion and curiosity I empty the cup and begin again. I empty a gallon into its eight ounce capacity and watch as the substance fills to the four ounce line and resists movement as the gallon finally reaches its end. Perplexed I set the eight ounce cup aside and pull a twenty ounce cup from the cupboard. Another gallon jug fills the new cup to ten ounces and the substance remains unmoving as the gallon's last drop doesn't even send ripples across the substance's surface.Always halfway.Never more.I rest my head in my hands, distressed.©magikarp
I'm tired of writingYet here I amI'm tired of beingYet here I standI'm just plain tiredBut I cannot sleepBecause I am not awake©magikarp
There's an emptiness inside that I'd forgotten about until a few moments ago when I heard your voice and cried like I did the day we learned you had died. Some answers just don't exist.Where did we go wrong?What could we have done?Why did you decide one more day was two too long?Who the hell am I even without you?Just one.Just one more irrelevant spec of matter in this cold, callous, careless universe.Just like you.I miss you, brother.©magikarp
Rigatoni And These Balls
I don't even have to cut anymore. So much blood covering my bedroom floor. For as weak as I've become I may as well be made of glass. Never would have guessed all this cancer in my lungs and throat could be such a pain in my aspirations; they're falling through the cracks of the foundation I built my whole life on this bed of lies. Fine, I admit it! I'm not okay!Well, would you look at that, nothing has changed.Heart's still broken, soul's still caged, brain's still drowning under skies of grey within this hurricane of rage and despair. And I never asked for any of this to be fair, but it would have been nice if it were at least possible. Nevertheless, there's nothing left. I chose the right, yet I'm still filled with death. And I'm reminded of it witheachandeverysinglebreath. . .©magikarp
if not for writing I would have died thousand times on my own home©fairytales_
Only dead fishes go with the flow.
What brought you here once again, in this wilderness? Are you lost? Are you a failure? Or that winter never left you? Are you still trapped amidst blizzard of unhappiness? Well life stings! Deal with it. Learn to GO WITH THE FLOW.... LIKE DEAD FISHES IN THE POND.©doux_torment
As the night knocks the door of light I keep myself enclosed in the quilt of darknessI can't open the door passing through the light As light scares meWhile darkness heals and feels like home.©doux_torment
I want you to know you are the reason I'm still trying to live instead of ending my life. You show me even in darkness there is beauty; and no matter how dark the night gets you will be bright again in the morning. So I keep living through the night knowing that even if things get darker, that means more beautiful stars will show up; and no matter how dark the night is in my life, the morning will come and brighten up my sky.©grace_craig
Just as hard as it is for one to listen to their pilot say the phrase, "easy victor" an indication that the plane is going to crash, so it is for me to imagine you say " it's over between us".©poetesschef
#feather #wod @miraquill @writersnetwork #writersbay #writerstolli #mirakee #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth IF I HAD WINGS OF SILK OR FEATHER..If I have wings..Wings of feather and silk..When I'm all done Cocooning I'll gasp in air Called freedom.. Freedom, gives me courageI unfurl these Curious thingsI instinctively know Are wingsAnd learn I can do Something with theseCalled, flying..Flying,Dipping And flutteringMagical fun Now with Wings undoneFeathers and webs Of silk are glistening..Glistening wings of silk Can fly as far as the SunCompletely freeFree of everything That keeps meFrom being me..Me, free to hear All, that in the morning sing.. Sing Free, I see The beauty In everything.. Everything in my dossierFeathers and gossamerI could fly away..Away from all That is ugly.. Ugly, gone I fly Towards Unending Ethereal Beauty..Beauty Now with wings No matter the creationI am free.. Free of the chains That have bound Me from flying..Flying from cocoon or tree Flying away From every nasty feelingI'm Flying away From the painI'll fly away from disease And any disabilityFrom all that's badI'll flyFly, far away..Away, If I had wingsNo matter if I'd make the flightI'd always fly Fly toward the light..Light surrounds meBecause of hundreds Of little wings That'd follow meThroughout the night..Night, Would move us as one Dancing, weaving within..The rays of moonbeamsLight and bright..Bright wings of gossamer and lightAnd Feathers made to fly and dance..Dance and flyPerfectly.. Harmoniously..In synchronicity.. Endlessly..Flying free..Because silk or feathers..I'd have wings.©reneewolfcrowdenunez
IF I HAD WINGS OF SILK OR FEATHER..
Even if my body were light as a feather I would not be able to fly. Because my heart has been heavier than a wrecking ball since we said goodbye.©grace_craig
#dark #poetry #sad #horror
The Wicked One.
I know you.Hollow eyes,words concealing deadly lies.Always on the prowl.Preying on the weak,a frail soul is what you seek.I remember you.Bloodthirsty as ever,craving for tears that aren't yours to shed.Tell me,do you ever mourn the dead?I pity you.A mere silhouette in this gloom,treading a path of doom.Too lost, too late.To be saved.©dark_carnage
As the light begins to intensify, so does the misery, and I wonder how it is possible to be hurt when nothing is wrong...When you cry so much, it makes you realize that breathing is hard & you know what's the hardest -It's to realise that you are still breathing.©_krashnika_
My love,grey cloud
The silent wordsThat you shower upon meAs sweet tearsYour dull faceLights up my dark lifeMy loveMy grey cloudVisit me soonI'm selfish Sucking up your sacrifice Let the world know How much you love me.©lydiafrancis