monsoonpaul

Thank you for being my muse ��

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  • monsoonpaul 8w

    Me and my introverted mind becomes the most extroverted persons when we go for a walk

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 8w

    These days crying feels like a crime
    Every single blink around me
    Looks like the flashes from a paparazzi
    You want to enjoy it secretly
    But someone catches you off guard with your agony
    Later the interrogation stage about the cause, 
    "Don't get disheartened. Life is a race just stay strong"
    Makes me really want to commit a real crime
    With obnoxious & anxious thoughts in my mind

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 10w

    #dad #wod #miraquill #writersnetwork #ceesreposts
    @miraquill

    Thank you for liking this @writersnetwork

    8th Mar 22'
    (And happy women's day to all the lovely and hard working women out there ��)

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    Letter

    Dear Daddy,

    It's a little bizarre that other than you, the entire world will be reading this letter which is verily written for you (lol).
    Anyways... I think you will agree with me (only on this thing) that we've always been ketchup and ice cream for each other and not like how all these Bollywood movies or even some in real life too portray how a daughter shares covalent bond with her dad only. I also agree that every single year we aged, with rage too...
    Sometimes even micro particles can't be properly detected under microscopes but we somehow always ended up making them a life size particle in our disagreements. When there were no 'reasons', we still tried to find the 'R's.
    But, there can never be any questions raised when it comes to your commitments & responsibilities. I mean how? Amidst your video call meetings, officials activities, shopping groceries, paying bills and fees, bringing maa's and your numerous diabetes medicines, you still remember my trivial tidbits like bringing a 5/- Dairy Milk or my favorite samosa chaat when I didn't even mention you to bring !
    Once which has been uttered from my lips, you have always successfully accomplished it. You never said 'NO' to any kind of my urgent needs as I've seen other parents who scrunch their noses if their child's assignments or courses demands an extra amount of expenditure than the usual times...So many nights and even days I've spent thinking if I fail to achieve what you've till date? If I just end up being another looser or a spoil brat? These thoughts frightens me a lot and I end up crying and cursing myself.
    I know it pisses me off when you can't understand something or tech related stuffs at once or just forget about my section or my faculties name but then I regret why I yelled or created a stupid scene. We have been kind of living in a long distance relationship specially during covid when I was sharing the same roof with you so I couldn't reflect my repentance or love... Today for the first time you wished me "Happy International Women's Day". I was astonished but more than that I was happy as you're not good with dates usually.
    Well as you know I'll be departing within 2-3 days for my college classes so I'll miss all of these our arguments and happy times too. From there too I'll get angry over the phone but still won't be able to say 'I love you' and will cry until nobody sees me.

    Yours Lovingly,
    Shona Mama
    (8th March 2022)
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 10w

    This won't be something special or enticing to read but this will be very close to my heart as this was the VERY FIRST poem that I wrote in English & started my so-called writing journey. I wrote this back in 3rd Aug 2014 for raksha bandhan. :)

    #siblings #wod #miraquill #writersnetwork #ceesreposts
    @miraquill

    Thank you for liking this @writersnetwork

    6th Mar 22'

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    MY BROTHER

    Oh my dear, please be here,
    I can't live without you anywhere.
    In your absence my life is empty,
    And my tears fall down like the Fall Kempty.
    Words can't express my love,
    That you are the best in this world.
    When anybody asks, "Whom do you admire?"
    I say "MY BROTHER" who is like an empire.
    Believing everyone is my weak point
    But when it comes to you, it's my plus point.
    I know that you are not a superman
    But, for me you are a superhuman.
    Now in your life you’ve got what you wished.
    Still there is one thing which is missing in your list,
    That is a perfect wife,
    Who would shape up your life.
    At last, I'll say sorry for making you cry
    But, trust me I'm searching for a good try.
    I want to be 'The Best' from 'The Worst'
    And make you feel proud to say, "Yes I've the right trust".
    Please never cry it hurts me very much
    And be the same 'cause I love you as such.

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 10w

    That Brown Suit

    And after such a wearying week,
    Weekends = "please let me sleep"
    But this weekend was a little special
    As I'll be meeting my Mr Essential.
    One who wakes up at 11 am on holidays
    Was ready by 7 am just to see his face
    I don't know how today he'll be dressed
    But his go-to Brown & White suits
    Have always made me impressed
    The clock was marching
    Along with my anxious heartbeats.
    "Out for delivery" my phone chimed
    I felt so ecstatic as if I saw this for first time

    "Aaj tumse pehli mulakat hogi
    Phir aamne samne baat hogi "
    (Was singing this out loud on my head)

    *ting - tong*
    Like adrenaline I rushed towards my door
    It was the moment I've been waiting for
    With utmost love & care I held him in my arms
    And let him sit on a sofa without causing any harm
    He looked perfect in his brown tailored suit
    And wore a bubble wrap shirt beneath this look
    To secure all the lovely presents for me
    That I bought from my hard earned money !

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 11w

    "What you want to become in future?"
    "A gaya-co-lo-gishh !!"
    Replied with my baby blunt voice
    When I was riding on your shoulders
    You & maa couldn't stop your laughter.
    I always thought I said something explicit
    But it was just my cuteness which you were enjoying it
    Since then,
    You turned my tiny room into College Street
    And after tuitions gave me best puchka treats.
    Every time I felt disgusted with History & Maths
    As after results my will power would collapse
    What is so fascinating to calculate my dad's age?
    Or learning about some old fashion World Wars
    Which would never happen again?

    But thank God !
    I passed my boards with pretty decent marks
    And for Biology in my school, I set a benchmark !
    More than maa your eyes were glistening with joy
    Now I guess there's nothing to be destroyed...

    When I was leaving for studies to a foreign land,
    Just like any typical middle class Indian parents
    Maa decked up my bags with sweaters & mittens
    And loads of homemade food & savories.
    After years of backpain & increased eye power,
    I was standing in front of my dream tower
    This time I was carrying you & maa on my shoulders in the form of my dreams
    Exciting, nerve wracking & jittery all it seems.
    Two years went within a blink of an eye
    Recalling those puchka treats with you makes me cry.


    "Students from India are requested to vacate their rooms immediately & book their flights for India as there are chances of major destruction between Ukraine & Russia"....

    It was 22nd of February,
    When I woke up to a similar headline like this
    Chills were traveling from my face to feet
    I decided this time not to pick up your call
    But, I did.
    "Beta where & how are you??"
    "I'm in my hostel & till now, I'm fine"
    "I'm trying for your ticket but they are quickly getting sold out but don't you worry my little tigress you'll quickly reach home safe and sound even if I have to sell my kidney for you ticket"
    "Are you mad? Khabardar agar aisa dobara aap bole toh. My roommates are also there we will surely figure out. Bye love you."...
    This might be our last call
    And even if not, I don't think I can talk.

    It's the third day & situations have worsened
    We have been moved to a bunker
    It is crowded & stinking badly
    There are no water or food supply.
    Unfortunately I've started bleeding too
    There are no dustbins or changing rooms
    I went to a corner with my belongings
    Each tear fell with an old memory scribbled over it.
    Honestly, I won't be sad if I die
    But your tigress couldn't become a gynecologist will haunt me till my 7th reincarnation
    It might hurt you, but slowly try to wake up without my thought & face in your phone
    Try to walk away from my favorite puchka stall
    Try to sleep early without waiting for a video call
    And please keep all of my achievements in my divan....
    Your "gaya-co-lo-gishh" will always love you ❤

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

    #surrounding #wod #ceesreposts #prayforukraine #miraquill #writersnetwork
    @miraquill
    I waited for so many days for your love ❤ & RP (2nd :') @writersnetwork

    28th Feb 22'

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    And now one thing I understood,
    Maybe History was waiting to make me a part of it's History !

    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 11w

    If you like cliché stuffs, you might like it :)

    #love #wod #ceesreposts #writersnetwork #miraquill
    @writersnetwork @miraquill

    Note : Mistress - a woman who has power, authority, or ownership: such as ; the female head of a household (source Merriam Webster)
    .
    .
    It's a very old school way of addressing lover & I haven't used it in the other infamous way :) [I know it's giving a wrong meaning that is why I've cleared it here]

    26th Feb 22'

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    The clock was ticking around 8:30
    I was standing near my casual tapri.
    Restlessly sipping my tea
    & was cursing the miserable Monday.
    " Bhaiya ek cup coffee aur ek maggi "
    I heard someone say.
    I quickly turned around to see this weird human.
    But, she turns out to be a winsome woman
    In a white denim with a navy boyfriend t-shirt
    And I with a sweaty attire was looking absurd.
    Frustrated with the absence of her coffee,
    I saw she was approaching towards me
    But she just walked away ignoring me...

    It was quite getting dark now
    So I had to reach home somehow
    Still, just for once I wanted a rewind
    'Cause that side profile was flickering on my mind.
    Layed on the bed, kept staring at the ceiling
    And started talking to my feelings.
    "If that lil glimpse & odd mix could hit me so much,
    Imagine if she had conversed !"
    After talking gibberish & mumbling
    I woke up to a new morning
    Like a kid, wished for some magic in my prayer.
    Sadly not noticing her for days filled me with despair.

    "Good things take time" 
    Well I was able to see that live
    When she crossed my path & fate again
    To make me mad in love & take away my pain.
    Watching her in kurti made me so ecstatic,
    With open hair, dainty jhumkas & a tiny bindi,
    Damn she looked like a Renaissance aesthetic.
    In a hallucinated room, her eyes can make me sober.
    And if those dimples appear, then everything will be over.
    I know you're unaware about my existence
    But someday I'll want you to make my mistress.
    I'm happy that we are standing in the same scene
    Not once but, twice for this magic to feel...
    Now, I closed my eyes to picture all the 'ifs' & thens'
    Like from being in a relationship to till the end.

    So after a hectic schedule, we can go for a walk
    If you'll be faraway, just call me we can talk.
    Discovering new cuisines & places,
    Swearing & giggling upon our exes,
    Oh I would love this to experience.
    Whenever we'll get into a fight,
    Honestly I'll forget the existence of the word 'pride'.
    I will never act like amateurs & address you as sexy
    Beacuse I want to have goals like Reynolds & Lively.
    On every weekends instead of "34+35" ,
    We can have our own Saturday Night Live
    Where we'll dance & scream on karaokes the whole night.
    As you're born with a gorgeous smile
    So never be shy to flaunt those smile lines
    As I have to stretch them bit by bit rest of my live....
    Miss Anonymous there's just one thing I can ask you for,
    When I'll be vulnerable & weak,
    Please hold me tightly till all of my tears shed through my cheeks.

    At last I'll conclude to you by saying that
    The day when you'll seize me through your one blink,
    On our first date I'll recite these lines & toast to you with a drink.

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 12w

    Void

    Was never enough, & would never be
    Unblinking art everywhere I can see.
    I wonder,
    How something so pretty & praiseworthy
    Can make me sink into jealousy or anxiety?
    How weird & funny isn't it?

    Hi I'm an eligible voter,
    Who tripped off the track to be a scholar
    And continuing being a dreadful daughter.
    Initially,
    My thoughts were like a white light & I was a prism
    So first I tried learning about expressions & rhythm
    But later realized I was lacking the precision.
    After this my dreams whispered about 'fashion'
    But the college I fancied about, didn't want that to happen.
    Sadly with a sour heart went to a privy university for this passion.
    Often in my room with my phone I tried karaokes
    When I was all alone or boredom used to hit me
    But it just turned out to be of an average quality.

    In between all of this,
    I forgot about something that I tried long back
    Is writing poems when I used to be sad.
    It was an impromptu act by a 15 years old
    Who wrote about her teenage angst & some stories untold.
    Tried to revive the hobby after being an adult
    But it was just turning out to be lame & absurd.
    (And the irony is, I'm writing now one)

    In a world full of physical Venus Flytraps
    I'm like a Touch-Me-Not plant
    Because a person with a bubble heart
    And eyes with everlasting leakage
    Can't survive the real life's Squid Game.

    I'm in my confused & lonely 20's
    But my colleagues are already in their 30's !
    Whenever I dive into my Instagram feed,
    Every other person is an entrepreneur, creator or an artist.
    Talking about LinkedIn, I become gutless
    Seeing other's 100 internships & getting placed,
    It's a major source to make you feel depressed.

    You all might call me a pessimist
    But trust me the actual truth is,
    These motivational quotes just lasts for 5 minutes.
    The minute after reading,
    "I'm worthless" song starts playing...

    Long story short,
    I'm neither a genius nor a girl with a crown
    I was never meant to ever stand out,
    Rather I was just meant to live in the crowds.

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 12w

    #ofsadness #wod #miraquill #ceesreposts #writersnetwork

    (I know but I'm sorry if it's not up to the mark)

    @miraquill @writersnetwork

    22nd Feb 22'

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    Sadness

    What is sadness?

    When you can feel the crimson liquid withering away from four chambers of your body & you can still work in your workplace with a paralyzed mind
    When your droplets of innocence falls down on the ground frequently like a tarnished leaf & there's nobody to catch or caress them
    When you start to weigh way lesser than what is being reflected on your weighing machine
    When your favourite cuisines no more entice you like your first love
    When you can still stand sober after bottles of temporary pleasure
    When you are no more affected by a crying baby...

    When you are sad, you are just a living corpse

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul

  • monsoonpaul 12w

    #temp #miraquill #writersnetwork #ceesreposts
    Likhne ke leye bas kuch likh diye

    22.2.22 (The day when @miraquill & @writersnetwork disappeared....maybe pranking or celebrating or retirement ��)

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    You are lyrics to my skeleton
    And music to my soul

    - Monsoon
    ©monsoonpaul