• daphnae 26w

    Taking glances at the pink sky, I plug in my earbuds and tune in to my playlist on 'shuffle mood'. The young zephyrs try playing with my bun and fail, as I smile at their endless efforts to jog it away. Buzzing on both sides of my head was a tune too familiar to my heart for it to skip a beat. A song I was intricately tangled with, every word and space that kept me intact over the edge. Solely, slowly I breathed out memories carved in the back of my mind for not too long. I spotted haziness elevating across the horizon and feeling fragile enough to move to another lunatic place, I simply change the song.

    And for the next few moments I got lost in the notes, among the rhythmic pauses the singer took in between the lyrics. The lyrics were simply the ones I once tried to boldly associate myself with. I smile at my ugly mistakes taking the shape of a huge mess around me. I think, think about how my life changed between the planned and unplanned moments of my life, of how one unplanned decision zeroed out every careful step I measured. Of how the dusk you wanted, soon escapes to dawn just by holding a hand. Of how my hand was numb against all the warmth subsiding it, and how I lost hope for another light holding it.

    I watch the space at my rooftop shrinking as my mother crowds it with new houseplants every week. I watch her every evening, go up to water them. I think about her obsession with the flowers which grow and bloom for weeks and wither after. It took me time to realize, to know about the peace it gave her as she had them grown over time. They remind me of my obsession with a void I don't want to grow. An irony breaking through the dark corners I once glittered with. I fill them in along my shoreline, weaving the maze I am probing into.

    (Old one. Just wanted to share. Will be reading you guys slowly.)

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