I love you
I have a different kind of connection with you, a spark that I haven't felt with any of my crush. Talking to you feels like being under a warm blanket on cold nights. I don't know what's it about you, but you make everything less chaotic and lively. You bring out the kid in me, which I've buried deep in my heart so safe that no one or even I could never reach it. But you made it easy. I don't feel embarrassed or ashamed of being silly, amatuer or whoever I wanted myself to be. I find you so cute when you are frustrated and yell on some random people. May be it sounds little weird, but I feel your presence listening to your playlist, every evening walking across the road under the streetlights.
Somedays I can't stop thinking about you but the other days i think why am I wasting my time even though I can't see any future together. Well! I'm hopeless. One part of me wants to think about you and the other part regrets doing that. End of the day, your thoughts make me feel alive and fall asleep with a mischievous smile on my face or can I say, I blush thinking of those rare midnight conversations we hold?
Why is all of my thoughts so pure about us? I don't know. All I can ever think of is how perfectly weird couple we could be and how much of cute byproduct we could together creat. I think of disturbing you when you are busy cooking in the kitchen and playing who-completes-first sort of games with food, because of the fact that we both are foodies.
May be, I loved living in my own little world, and so I never had any rush to confess about my feelings for you. I won't, probably never. Or perhaps, I might tell you the day I'm completely over you, because then it would be all about past and makes it easier for me. But the question here to myself is, can I get over you? If I did, then probably because it's just crush. What If I can't? And this thought scares the shit outta me.
I don't know if all these feelings are temporary or permanent but I loved them. So, I'll keep writing every now and then about you but will never show them until unless I get over you.