• maleficent_ 23w

    why do i even try to write anymore

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    Look at me ,
    Can you hear me ?

    Voices , questions bounce around me
    and I never dare to pick out one of them and face it ,
    I'm too un-coordinated for that , too shaky on my
    own feet and you expect me to
    carry your baggage on my chest ? How could I ?
    I'm just a mass of regrets , untouchable to sanity .
    A coward , running away from mirrors , If I face me
    the last thread will snap .
    So I let veins inside my skin tighten until I can't breathe and
    screams in my head amplify .
    I draw eyes wherever I go , haunted , gauged out eyes
    and they witness me slowly disintegrating , waiting for
    when I finally scratch my skin Out and strangle myself .

    Paper towels don't soak up bubbling anxiety or the violent flow of panic , they soak up just the oil of confessions .
    I seal my mouth with duct tape to keep my insides from spilling out , but the whites of my eyes bleed .
    There are no vultures here to eat my corpse ,
    there are penthouses filled with bright people hiding gory secrets .
    It's 5 am , the loop continues and there are mirrors ,
    there are mirrors everywhere .

    - R