• laconicutterance 165w

    4am
    all i hear is
    the chaos in my
    thoughts. I hear
    the sun and the
    moon.
    the voices in
    among the trees.
    they want me
    to write about them
    but I'm lying here
    trying to come
    up with thoughts
    I can call mine.
    4:03am
    last to last week I
    met this old woman
    she was sitting
    beside the
    white lilies.
    I talked to her.
    I remember her
    saying," once all the
    worst part is over
    life will bring the
    real beautiful
    things
    for you
    and you'll
    be happy
    to be the part
    of this universe."
    "its been really long
    and life seems
    more dark now" I said.
    she smiled, it
    was the most
    beautiful smile I
    had seen in
    a while.
    she loves to talk
    and I love to
    listen, always.
    it's been a while now.
    I miss her.
    4:05am
    It's vacant,
    the feeling. I'm
    either going
    through a writers
    block or I have
    forgotten how to
    let out my
    words.
    4:06am
    they're still loud
    the voices in my head;
    sometimes I don't know
    what they really mean.
    I just hear them,
    screaming. And I
    say nothing.
    I scramble through
    the words
    alone.
    but everything
    seems vain.
    4:07am
    She might be
    sleeping now.
    I sometimes think
    about her.
    her smile.
    I don't know
    what she wanted me
    to understand.
    life is beautiful?
    I don't see it.
    5:08am
    I'm out.
    I see the street
    lights are low now
    with the sun
    about to rise.
    I'm standing on the
    roof.
    I'm looking at life.
    And I see this.
    The sunrise.
    the glow.
    after the darkest
    of my night.
    and maybe
    this is what she
    saw.
    She meant
    back then.
    Maybe.
    I stare.
    I smile.

    ©laconicutterance