4am
all i hear is
the chaos in my
thoughts. I hear
the sun and the
moon.
the voices in
among the trees.
they want me
to write about them
but I'm lying here
trying to come
up with thoughts
I can call mine.
4:03am
last to last week I
met this old woman
she was sitting
beside the
white lilies.
I talked to her.
I remember her
saying," once all the
worst part is over
life will bring the
real beautiful
things
for you
and you'll
be happy
to be the part
of this universe."
"its been really long
and life seems
more dark now" I said.
she smiled, it
was the most
beautiful smile I
had seen in
a while.
she loves to talk
and I love to
listen, always.
it's been a while now.
I miss her.
4:05am
It's vacant,
the feeling. I'm
either going
through a writers
block or I have
forgotten how to
let out my
words.
4:06am
they're still loud
the voices in my head;
sometimes I don't know
what they really mean.
I just hear them,
screaming. And I
say nothing.
I scramble through
the words
alone.
but everything
seems vain.
4:07am
She might be
sleeping now.
I sometimes think
about her.
her smile.
I don't know
what she wanted me
to understand.
life is beautiful?
I don't see it.
5:08am
I'm out.
I see the street
lights are low now
with the sun
about to rise.
I'm standing on the
roof.
I'm looking at life.
And I see this.
The sunrise.
the glow.
after the darkest
of my night.
and maybe
this is what she
saw.
She meant
back then.
Maybe.
I stare.
I smile.

©laconicutterance