reneewolfcrowdenunez

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  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 9h

    #child #wod #dreams #moredreampoetry @writersnetwork #writersbay #ceesreposts @writerstolli @miraquill @thehappinessproject @ #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth
    (Thank you so much for your ❤ @writersnetwork I'm truly honoured!)

    What she wanted
    When she was a little girl..

    More than toys and dresses
    More than sweets
    And
    Hair Parlor done, tresses..

    When she was
    A little girl,
    All she wanted was
    A daddy who tells her
    he's so proud, she came along..

    His little princess
    Of their castle..

    She dreamed of her mother
    The Queen!
    So regal,
    She had what seemed
    An untouchable diamond like sheen..

    But, nothing
    Could be further
    From the truth
    For she had soft
    Mommy snuggles..

    And would sing to her
    When she knew
    That she was sad..

    Taking away, for the moment
    All that was bad..

    Her daddy knew
    That she didn't
    Need to be a boy
    To play baseball..

    Just hugs
    After home runs
    And that look of how
    He really felt
    About his little girl..

    It was written in his eyes
    A love, that could NOT be disguised..

    Her mother held her
    As she shared her woes
    Let her drown her
    In her all her tears..

    Stayed right there. through it
    When the little girl
    Bruised her heart and spirit..

    Yet still, fixed
    All scraped up parts
    She, of the family, was the heart..

    And they made sure that
    Their daughter learned
    Wisdom, from the start..

    Through their love
    Through a life, filled
    With 1000's of books
    And all manners
    Of Worldwide art..

    She loved her beloved parents
    Every day and every night
    Even when she wakes each day
    To her real waking, life..

    You maybe thought
    That this was the end
    It would have been
    So pretty and pristine
    To end it right then..

    But let's end this in honesty..

    That's really more bitter
    Than sweet..

    But
    It's also how it really is..

    For many more, than just me..

    That just makes any story
    Woefully incomplete..

    No story is scarless..

    She was orphaned by evil
    But refuses, with them
    To have anymore in common..

    Than liking
    Very old antiques..
    And dark soulful eyes
    Just like her momma..

    Dreams are her life and
    When life isn't a dream
    She still tries to shine likes the sun..

    Relishing ice creams, especially sherbet
    Even when it seems like her life is over

    And when she's drowning
    In the torrential
    Rains and the mud..

    Out come that little girl
    That waves at every passing car
    Just to see someone smile
    Wantimg EVERYONE to know
    REALLY how much she loves
    Life
    Everything and everyone
    Even after another inevitable
    Survival, battle..

    So, even now
    As her time seems
    To have come undone
    Barely
    Able to keep her brush lifted
    She remembers all
    That's she has been gifted
    Dreadlocks of misery, no doubt
    Are upon her head
    But we all know
    The end waits for no one..

    YET, the war within the girl, is won
    And so will it be,if another is to come
    AND like a child she is free
    To dance in her dreams, once again.

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

    Read More

    MEMORIES THAT TASTE LIKE RAINBOW SHERBET..

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 2d

    #Mirror #dreams #wod @writersnetwork #writersbay #ceesreposts @writerstolli @miraquill #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth @thehappinessproject

    WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR..

    My face hides from me..

    I'm either too scared
    Or the mirror, is overly kind..

    And since I can't see beyond
    Where I won't allow me
    To see past
    The Illness and age..

    Which for me, sometimes
    Might
    Be too frightening..

    So when I look in the mirror
    I'm really seeing nothing..

    Trying to avoid EVER
    Seeing ANYTHING..

    If I want to see me..

    If I MUST see something..

    It must be
    In my dreams
    To produce an image of myself..

    Faeries sprinkling dust
    On everything that needs
    Healed..

    And 'round now
    My ageless heart..

    They made this heart
    Protected and sealed
    Never again needing
    To look into a mirror..

    But a Cupid
    And a Seraphin
    Gave me the gift of sight
    So I could look
    Into my beloveds eyes
    That showed me, what HE saw..

    So I finally know what
    Beauty actually looks like..

    When I look
    In HIS eyes..

    My one truthful mirror
    That actually catches my sight!
    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR, MY FACE HIDES
    FROM ME..


    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 3d

    #strange #romantic #dreams #wod @writersnetwork #writersbay @Writerstolli @miraquill #Thehappinessproject (Thank you @writersnetwork for your support and ❤ and a huge gracious thank you @miraquill for my EC!)


    Eyes open, I sit quietly
    Alone, with a hint of the morning sunlight..
    Light and bright
    Dancing, in a drop of dew
    I see me and I see you
    And I begin to daydream
    Of those moments
    To sweetly reminisce
    On your encompassing embrace
    And that one
    Beautiful
    Dream(y)
    Kiss..

    Watching
    As the rain began to pour down..
    In the same direction
    As my dream filled Head, awash
    In fat, hot, heavy tears
    And rain
    And somehow
    I knew I wasn't really with you
    Raindrops washed away dreams
    The
    Crystalline dewdrops
    Along with the fast disappearing teardrops
    That now are co-mingled with the Raindrops
    That fell fast and hard
    From darkening clouds..

    I am
    Running now
    To escape the onslaught
    That started out so peaceful
    And with only a soft velvet
    Blanket
    Shining with stars
    And its wrap
    The midnight sky..

    These
    diamond drops
    Of humid night dew
    Changed in the rain
    From light and magical
    To heady and warm
    Along with my dreamy thoughts
    That keep bringing me back
    To YOU..

    And our late night
    Into morning
    Story
    Where you and I
    Danced
    Upon the backs of stars
    And in amongst planets
    Tilting in the night sky..

    Breaking through to a cerilium
    Morning light
    And the lightest tint
    Of the colors mixed with joy
    And a shimmering mist
    Where I see you..

    But
    can't
    Quite
    Reach
    You..

    Just wanting to touch
    Last nights dreams of you
    Me and us..

    One
    More
    Time

    Yet I am in
    That crisp clean dew
    Of this morning blues..

    Without you..

    Before I go back
    To face this life
    That is (what is)
    REALLY mine..

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    ON THE BACKS OF STARS

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 4d

    This is my 4th attempt at writing for the #WOD, today and the "home" theme, as #nostalgia is sometimes dark, but i love you my miraquill friends and i give you never less, than my whole ❤

    #Nostalgia #wod @miraquill @writersnetwork #writersbay #thehappinessproject #ceesreposts @writerstolli #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth @elli_mcfarlane @reneenunezbffaa

    When I was a baby girl
    My mummy there, still alive
    And seeing things as a little one
    My rose glasses were always on
    And everything was home
    When I was with my beloved MoM
    (My) Chocolate chip cookies
    And singing her favorite song
    While(me) her baby babbled along
    I was just a mere tiny child
    The only things that caught on
    Were memories, etched so deep
    They're etched into
    My heart's very core
    Memories of the first time
    They started to take my home
    And my mommy were hazy...
    But
    My sister's were hidden and gone
    My brother and my mommy bloody
    Crying, screaming
    Police and ambulance sirens
    Craziness and E.M.T.s looking upon us
    With sadness
    And how they pitied most Involved
    Because they thought we DIDN'T know What was going on
    But somehow we KNEW
    We were going to lose
    What we called home.
    We said our goodbyes
    Still seeing my home
    Through eyes colored with rose..
    And yet, time and time
    They let us come home again..
    And what I saw
    I started to really see
    Became darker
    And more frightening..
    Our father making us speak of
    The different horrors
    In each of the foster homes
    My father would rant and rail
    About any abuses
    And they paid him by the thousands
    Never knowing that
    What he was doing
    To his wife and 4  children..
    So distasteful and so wantonly evil
    That it was enough
    To give him a seat
    At the devils right hand
    When his life, lived so evil was gone..
    But my mommy stayed with him
    Until she was finally so broken
    We forever lost our home..
    And forever looked for another one..
    Because of that fateful day
    Where everything changed
    And where all our lives were saved
    From an overflowing river, but one..
    Our mother was declared dead
    But body forever, unfound
    And questions of what went on
    At this "home"
    That left us with only Death
    Hopelessness and despair
    That followed us, for most of our lives Until my brother died
    On the streets less a home
    Or a comfortable death-bed..
    With many a disease
    But mostly the disease
    Of a badly broken heart..
    I'll always have more questions
    Than I'll ever have answers
    And can rarely talk about either..
    I just live my life with my heart
    Like EVERYWHERE is home
    By the hearth I offer
    If you need to feel loved and warm..
    And I try not to say this
    Like I'm anyone special
    But even if I get it wrong
    Sometimes
    I'm still here
    For a homey tea and talk..
    I'd just be best off
    To not often think
    Too nostalgically..
    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    Home (looking back)

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 5d

    #pod #struggles #@writersnetwork @writerstolli #writersbay #ceesreposts #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth @thehappinessproject *(some of the things i struggle with)


    I heard a car alarm go off
    At least once that hour..

    And once a week that spring
    The rain on my head, did shower..

    Fire trucks rushed by my house
    At least twice a night..

    And seeking warmth that winter
    Hundreds of geese
    Will have taken flight..

    Maybe once or twice
    That year
    I noticed
    A flag flying half-mast..

    And everyday
    After school
    The kids around me
    Were having a blast..

    Yet
    In my
    Own small world
    That had me jailed
    In increments of time..
    I was a prisoner
    In a clock
    -Frozen-
    Never
    A forward wind..

    Leaving me
    To notice
    The lack of You..
    Each second
    Of each minute
    Of every hour
    And this day
    Becomes all week
    Then a month..
    And like a dust
    Blew away
    That whole painful year..

    I had thought of you
    Every nano-moment
    And from you
    I did not hear..

    So I whispered prayers
    Screamed through tears
    Talked to walls
    Begged
    My God
    Let this year
    Not turn to year(s)..

    You must know
    Without you two
    I was beyond
    My own despair
    Not knowing what to do..
    In a barren land
    With breaths not taken
    My heart crystallized
    Freezing
    Around this breaking..

    Time had
    Stopped.

    I wore
    My prison blues
    To bed..
    Struck down
    Alone
    With thoughts of you
    Trapped, stuck
    O N I G!
    B U C N
    Like a ball
    ...Forever...
    In my head..

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    As Time Passes On, Without You..

    In my own small world
    That had me jailed
    In increments of time..
    I was a prisoner
    In a clock
    -Frozen-
    Never
    A forward wind..
    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 5d

    #joy #findingthatwhichfillsyoursoulwithjoy #wod #writersnetwork @miraquill @writersnetwork #writersbay #thehappinessproject #ceesreposts @writerstolli #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth

    (I just wanted to thank @writersnetwork for their support and their❤, thank you WN!!)


    ¡WRITE ON.. ( RIGHT ON! )

    continue on
    with pen in hand
    where is the meaning
    of the unspoken man?

    write on..
    !right on!

    to those who speak
    of tales and lives
    that had left them
    beaten and weak..

    i tell
    of every inner feeling..

    leaving some scared of me
    their minds still reeling.
    An empath that sometimes
    Says to much
    I Should stay quiet
    On these matters..
    But, I sometimes cannot help
    Myself, with a pen
    That onwardly chatters

    i ask and tell and scream and shout
    ¡my God!
    but where is (s)he?
    in my fingers?
    pushing or pulling
    it out
    onto paper
    to finalize the
    setting me free?

    i a woman
    i see of men
    i see us all
    in our shell
    called human.

    despair?
    who cares?
    we just blast
    through this bloody life..
    but i care..

    and dig deep within
    rip and pull at this courage
    that tries to stay hidden.

    i pray, save me! save me!
    from myself..

    And thanks be
    for giving me this
    this joyful gift
    That I will share
    With others..

    This gift..

    i was given
    when i found
    and took down
    that paper and pen
    off, my dusty shelf.

    Write On.. ( Right On! )
     
       

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    A JOY FILLED GIFT (FOR, THE HEART THAT FOUGHT DARKNESS*)

    WRITE ON!(keep writing)RIGHT ON!(Good job, way to go) ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 1w

    #brave #joy #wod #pod #writersnetwork @miraquill @writersnetwork #writersbay @Writerstolli #ceesreposts #thehappinessproject #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth

    "A person often meets their destiny, on the path they took to avoid it"'Jean de la Fontaine'


    She didn't exist
    Before she was six..

    No God
    No Santa
    No birthday gifts..

    Yet, many a foster home
    To treat her so badly..

    I suppose it didn't matter

    She had no social security card..
    Or a birth certificate
    For birthdays she never
    Remembered having..

    No..

    Shoes to wear
    Food to eat
    And she was dirty..

    But not just her
    Face and tousled
    Chopped off hair..

    Inside her
    It felt dirty as well..

    Growing up
    Inches from hell..

    But I think it mattered
    The most to her
    That she had no mama..
    No arms around her
    No love unconditional
    Long ago she lost her face
    But she
    Can't even
    Anymore
    Remember her name
    Which brought her and left her
    At the edge of despair..

    And for her mother
    To explain to her
    That life, very rarely
    Was ever, very fair..

    Orr..
    All of her "various mothers"
    Who let all her "various fathers"
    Take her
    Frightened
    Off and alone..

    And when they were done
    They left her
    Emotionless
    And raw to the bone..

    Her heart weighted down
    Like around her neck
    Hung
    A heavy stone..

    Yet, a Heavenly Spirit
    And Earth Angels
    Abound
    Lifted her up
    And tore off the bindings
    That left her to drown..

    She became a person
    That not only existed..

    But a woman
    Who lives
    And loves
    And laughs with her children..

    Her friends
    Her loves
    Her angels
    Her God..

    Broke her free
    From a cycle
    She DIDN'T pass on..

    Darkness
    Turned to light
    And broke through
    A seemingly
    Never-ending night..

    And
    There's a possibility
    That
    It can be, someday
    We all end up
    Brave and free..

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    *THE PATH SHE TOOK TO FREEDOM..

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 1w

    #portrait #wod @writersnetwork #writersbay #ceesreposts @writerstolli @miraquill @mirakeeworld #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth (Thank you so much, @writersnetwork for your❤)

    A darkening surge of magical light
    seems to somehow best describe her...

    yet seems as confusing
    as the sound it is making
    as it comes
    from a noisy mind
    not ever again
    to surpass
    these silenced lips..

    -gone-

    to a pen
    whose ink flows into words
    put to lines
    greeting ones eye

    and equally as beautiful as all that..

    gold
    that lashes about and sheen's
    grasping at your attention
    leading straight
    to the carillon blue gateway..

    that is
    to a soul
    set in the ways of mother/crone
    loving
    and yet unwilling
    bend-less, embrace..

    unless

    it is that..

    the earth
    wind
    water
    fire
    and moon/sun
    Will have to
    command it so..

    And all the rest..

    That only
    mother
    "nurtures"
    crone
    "I am.."
    and maiden
    "forever!"
    encircle us
    in a mesmerizing dance..
    and
    "you are"..

    you are
    the song and the dance
    the laughter and the tears..
    you are
    the teacher and the taught..
    and
    you are
    the mountain that moves
    only in the sight of the goddess..

    yet i will not forget the seed i planted
    as the last of the sunset
    allowed that mighty mountain its minute for me..

    still
    it stood..
    for near a moment
    that seemed to turn into a quarter of a century..

    you allowed me to share in your touch
    beyond ozone-less breath..

    I lost my mind
    in what was said
    what wasn't
    and what was thought
    to of been said..

    those heavens and hells
    a treasure
    of a Gaelic nymph
    goddess mother
    wisest crone
    wavering tree
    flowers free
    and unmoving mountains
    that moved this earth..

    take her all away

    my own personal Pompeii..

    bring her back

    only in the form of a dream..

    "magical lights of black"

    all forms we possess or lack

    yet all pieces
    together
    with her
    we're not..

    holes would turn whole
    if you were to just
    keep your promises
    and believe in us..

    don't confuse this moment
    with nothingness
    meaninglessness
    confusion
    and flight..

    yet only
    with knowing
    who she is
    she is..
    and how that
    leaves me so empty
    and yet fills me so fully
    with bitter-sweet, sight.

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    AND HOW CAN I BEST DESCRIBE HER?

    ( a (portrait) of the end of 25year old friendship, not an amicable end But this is how I see her with my ❤)
    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 1w

    #song #wod @writersnetwork #writersbay #ceesreposts @writerstolli #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth @miraquill @mirakeeworld (Inspired by Leonard Cohen's song"death of a ladies man")(Thank you so much @writersnetwork for my❤!!)

    Pat the bed and
    Request "just a cuddle"
    Lust just behind
    Those smoldering
    Deep, dark eyes..

    Buuut..

    I KNOW the impact of a cuddle

    Until and when we snuggle..

    Tis' not the "platonic"
    Warmth
    And
    Love
    We'll feel for each other..

    With just a "normal"
    Cuddly "snuggle"..

    In our minds

    And

    In these
    Beating..
    Thumping..
    Pumping..

    Of our hearts..
    And
    Our bodies..

    -IT-

    This "cuddle"

    IT is more..

    We'll have to explore..
    Our real thoughts
    On our "cuddle"..

    More than
    "We'll just be talking"

    Reaching out for..
    Just a kiss on the neck?

    A nibble for the earlobe?

    Softly, yet
    Maybe a LITTLE
    Dirty..
    Suggestions skillfully
    Suggested..

    The love-making
    Inevitable after..

    The hot breaths..
    The Kissing..
    The Hugging...

    ALL that started
    With "let's just cuddle"..

    Tis' a "cuddle"
    That goes beyond..

    What our feelings feel..

    NOT just yours
    Nor
    Just mine..

    Just those that they are
    innocently intertwined..

    Yet,
    As our feelings just pass
    Through talk..
    That innocently lead
    To a blink and a sigh
    But then captured
    By a silent invitation
    Of your beautiful eyes
    That you say
    Get lost into mine..
    And
    I melt
    Into you..

    Our hand finds a rhythm..
    Sliding
    Our fingers
    Left with an electric currency
    Up and down
    Our intertwined thighs
    Lightning striking..

    -It-
    -You-
    -Me-
    This could be
    "cuddle" action
    But
    Even though OUR minds
    Have gone to heaven..
    Our non-action
    Of our"cuddle"
    Tells me
    Enough
    For now..
    What will happen
    !Everytime!
    Without the knowing how..

    Nothing wrong with such
    Romantic propositions
    Acrobatic
    Passions and positions..

    For now, just for now
    Dreams will be dreams

    Most assuredly
    And erotically..
    What will happen

    Because..

    I know
    The impact of our "cuddles"..

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    "LET'S JUST CUDDLE"

    Inspired by the song "Death Of A Ladies Man" BY "Leonard Cohen"

    *BEWARE, ADULT CONTENT

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

  • reneewolfcrowdenunez 2w

    #friendship #wod @miraquill @writersnetwork #writersbay @Writerstolli #ceesreposts #TrudgingTowardsTheTruth (Thank you so much @writersnetwork for your ❤!)

    SUN AND MOONLIGHT VIGIL..

    Moon
    Held in azure velvet
    Yellow
    Mingles
    All around it
    Universal
    Stars
    Moon
    Sky
    Collide
    With dusky night and fire..
    And
    In the morn '
    The golden orb
    To be adored
    As she looks down
    With her glorious light
    For all of us
    From flora to fauna..
    Gifting life
    She, the sun
    And her brother, The Moon
    Together
    To keep US
    Complete..
    Lightly dark
    During the setting
    When the daytime is done..
    And slightly darkened
    Right before
    Dawn gives birth
    To the Sun..

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez

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    SUN AND MOONLIGHT VIGIL

    ©reneewolfcrowdenunez