I know I should've but I would've only if I could've.

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  • risingdrop 7w

    Definitely not back yet :)

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    "I'm tired of finding love around me" There, I have said it. I am tired of always being positive, seeing good in everything that comes across. I am tired of turning mere humans into poems that rhymes with my sadness, putting ordinary words on blank pages and making an art out of it. Sometimes it's a crime to glorify things that deserve to be loved for its simplicity.

    Humans are like that only. Poets have mislead the whole idea of love while trying to keep alive their muses in the form of poetry for an eternity. It doesn't work that day.

    It's not really about seeking constellations around the corner of their eyes, but about stealing each other's glances when teacher turns towards the board and start giggling as soon as your eyes meet. It's about having someone to do all those mundane things with, without feeling insecure about revealing how much you suck at those things.

    It's not about writing those thousands of metaphors on the last page of your diary and let them decipher the love you are hiding in between those lines, but simply sending a text "Call me when you reach home." Or saying "I've made some tea for you, just the way you like - some extra chai patti and only one spoon of sugar."

    No, you see, we have got it all wrong. It's not about the "Okay" shared in between Hazel Grace and Augustus Waters or the "Always" that stayed just between Severus Snape and Albus Dumbledore, but about the longing you felt after coming out of these fictional worlds.

    - Rutvik

  • risingdrop 79w

    A detour or a story, eh? Don't mind me please.

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    There are times when I do nothing but lay still and stare at these old walls and rusty furniture while listening to 70's music, yeah well I am into old music but in my defense, trust me it's addictive. The kind of calmness and energy they bring to you at the same time is pure bliss, you can just dive into pool of those lyrics and yet you can never get enough of it.

    But tbh, I wasn't always a fan of old songs, I was just as clueless as any teenager would be these days about that golden period of music, until I took a detour to my grandparents home. We went there for the first time when I was still a little baby and after that the work-life of city hit my parents and we couldn't make such trip again, until last summer. It was my vacation period and Baba wanted some time off from his corporate life so we decided to have that trip again.

    I didn't really know what was waiting for me there, but I was really excited because I had heard lots of things from friends like, grandparents love you unconditionally, to be precise blindly, you can make any mistakes or do whatever you want and still they won't punish you or give you lectures like Ma and Baba. And no matter how much food you eat, it's never enough for them.

    It was around five in the evening when we finally reached there. I was really exhausted from that twelve hours journey and just wanted to go straight to the bed as soon as we enter the house, but when I got out of our car, I saw my grandpa sitting there on his comfy chair in the middle of a veranda and sipping a cup of chai (later I found out that it was coffee, unfortunately my grandpa is a coffee person.) while enjoying the background music that was playing on a radio. I could see that he was really into it because he was trying to sing along with the singer without caring about his own voice.

    "ये शाम मस्तानी, मदहोश किये जाये
    मुज़हे डोर कोइ खींचे, तेरी और लिए जाए."

    I heard this line for the very first time in my life and instantly fell in love with the song. So instead of going straight to the bed I sat there with my grandpa and the first thing we talked about after all these years was music, silly right? But trust me, we really bonded over music that day, we were the only one in the house who used to get goosebumps while thinking about which magical melody will come next in the queue.

    He introduced me to all the legends like Kishore da, Pancham da, R. D. Burman sahab, Lata ji, Asha ji, and last but not least Mohammed Rafi sahab. He told me his famous story of how he proposed his love of the life, my grandma, in front of her college friends while playing her favorite song in the background,

    "प्यार दीवाना होता है मस्ताना होता है
    हर ख़ुशी से हर गम से बेगाना होता है."

    At first she looked down and covered her face but then after a second or two she looked into grandpa's eyes and knew that they were meant to be together. As soon as she nodded her head to say yes, it started raining and my grandpa being a total Bollywood freak, he started shouting,

    "Look, it's like God giving us blessings, We are really meant to be together."

    My grandma's face turned red and she was really embarrassed, but she knew what was she getting into so she didn't stop him and instead they both started singing and dancing like a Bollywood couple. (At least this is what my grandpa told me happened, but my grandma's version is a little different and more realistic one tbh. But I never confronted him, neither did grandma, I guess that's what love is, loving them despite of all those irregularities.)

    Finally it was time for us to leave, jump back into our old city life and join the rat race again, but before that I wanted to enjoy one last our hour of grandpa's special playlist while sipping cup of adark wali chai with pudina in it. (my grandma's speciality) And little did I know that my grandpa had saved the best for last,

    "चलते चलते, मेरे ये गीत याद रखना
    कभी अलविदा ना कहना
    कभी अलविदा ना कहना
    रोते हँसते, बस यूँही तुम गुनगुनाते रहना
    कभी अलविदा ..."

    A total drama queen, eh?

    - Rutvik

  • risingdrop 98w


    When in love, you always try to trace back everything to that certain someone,

    that dialogue from a movie feels so real and the proposal, your mind runs at least a thousand test runs to think about what you will say when that someone will propose you, how you would react, you want them to do it like your favorite character did in a movie.

    At your favorite place, that small coffee house across the street, nearby your home, where you guys first met.

    When in love, you start looking at your face in mirror more often, that glow on your face gives away your secrets to strangers, they can witness your heart beating faster than ever, your eyes, they speak louder than a thousand words from a love letter ever can, you look out for things unknowingly that you never cared about before, you want to be the best version of your self in each way possible.

    When in love, you become vulnerable too, you give yourself away in a most selfless way possible, you heart, it doesn't want to hold back, all the feelings rush into your mind and all you could think is the moments you spent with that someone.

    You know it might never happen, that someone may not feel the same way about you, but that doesn't change the fact that you have fallen in love.

    When in love, you suddenly start enjoying weather, that breeze blowing from your balcony is still the same, but now it has some different essence, or perhaps it always had that but you noticed it just now, clouds instantly change your mood and you can never get enough of stars now.

    You notice that variations in shape of moon everyday while trying to figure out what the other person would be doing at that time.

    When in love, you may not share 'I love yous' more often, but those nods when your eyes meet make up for it perfectly.

    - Rutvik

    Pic credit :- to respective owner


    @bluebird okay, no mistakes in a name this time.��

    @allbymyself @greypages_ @the_story_weed

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  • risingdrop 99w

    @blubird look I found some words today. XD

    @allbymyself @the_story_weed @greypages_

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    To/about her

    Sometimes when words fall asleep on your lips I hope you sing lullabies to them, I hope you remind yourself about how my ears were always excited to listen to your poetries that your hands scribbled on some white torn pages of your diary. I wonder if I had words lying across my brushed lips waiting to be heard by you, would they sound as beautiful as the ones that you utter when you tell our stories to people by adding superheroes and villains or spacecraft and fairies to make it a little more dramatic as well as fictional.

    You were always afraid of people getting to know a little more about you than they deserved, you were always skeptical about the idea of shouting your lover's name from the top of the mountain. You believed in small things, like the favourite music you shared or the favourite food you ate at your favorite place. You think that love is not so different than all the other things that we do every day.

    I must admit though, you were best at hiding your tears, from me, from your parents and from this world. I don't know why but when I used to ask, you always said the same thing, "These tears are my mistakes, mistakes that I made while trusting people too much, they remind me of ugliness of this world and I want to keep it to myself because let's be honest, we all are doomed in one way or the other and we all have our share of pain."

    You remind me of happiness in its purest form, the time when Chandler proposed Monica, Harry hugged Sirius, Louisa danced with William and when Augustus and Hazel shared their first 'okay'. You remind me of all the happy endings where my heart broke a little and my eyes shed some tears but I had a wide smile spread across my lips.

    - Rutvik

  • risingdrop 101w

    // Living with the memories //

    I'm addicted to a different kind of sadness, the one where I'll show you symptoms of a happy man or a boy, like any face that you could think of while imagining the crowd at the metro station or at the airport,

    A man Who has a wide smile spread across his lips because he is going to see his fiance after a whole year or

    A boy who is dancing at the metro station because he is so excited to ride in a metro for the very first time.

    But at the same I'll remind you of an old man in his late 60's, living alone in his big old house, his son and daughter are long gone from his life, busy in making their own little paradise, at first they used to visit him every now and then with his grandchildren, but as everything and everyone changes with time, they also changed.

    His wife left him a little too early, just after a couple of years of marriage, that was the first time he came across sadness, the kind where he was smiling when his kids said their first words, but at the same time tears were rolling down from his eyes as there was no one else to share that moments with.

    I'll remind you of that five years old kid who couldn't speak or write like other kids from his class and everyone else made fun of him because he stammered a little while giving his speech, he doesn't know why his heart aches after hearing all those comments, he wants to slap them and shout on them, but instead he sits in a corner, all alone, thinking why God made him like this.

    Your sixteen years old girlfriend broke up with you today so you are sad and you think that your life is nothing but a tragedy and it won't ever be same without her so you try to take your own life, but can you think of a guy whose wife was killed in the bomb blast that happened at the shopping mall? She wanted him to come with her, but he was too tired to wake up from his bed so she went alone after making sure that her one year old twins are asleep, can you think of his desperation to alter the past, to remove just one day from it?

    You see, I am all of that, that five years old kid or a boy at the metro station or a guy whose wife was killed or an old man living alone with all these memories, all of them is me.

    - Rutvik


    Pic credit :- Pinterest
    Title credit :- @rhapsodist

    @allbymyself @greypages_ @bluebird

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  • risingdrop 102w


    "I like to watch these blue skies running away from me you know, but at the same time they remind me of people who ran away from me, never to look back again and it makes me really sad." Revathi uttered while staring outside of window.

    "They are clouds you dumbo." Shantanu laughed from behind.

    "Ya ya okay, clouds... Whatever!" Revathi felt irritated.

    "You know, you can look it in a different way. Like how everyday different clouds come under your sky from far away, just for you." Shantanu presented his idea calmly.

    "Yesss, I suppose. I never thought that way. Thank you Mr smarty pants for that." She smiled while saying this.

    "Ayee, you brightest witch of your age. You sure know what irritate me the most." He threw cusion at her.

    "Same back at you Miss chanandler bong." She threw the same cusion back.

    "Well, at least I am the funny one here." He stood up and sat beside her.

    "Now now, why are you still sad?" He asked her when she put her head on his lap.

    "No. Nothing as such. It's just a thought, but why clouds and people have to leave you, especially just when you start to feel comfortable around them? Why can't I just own my people and if possible clouds too?" She took his hand in between her both hands while saying this.

    "Well, first thing first, that's not possible okay. And besides that there are others like you, waiting for their share of clouds so it's not wise to keep all for us, is it? And people, they are rather more complicated you know. You can't make choices for others, everybody has their own feelings. So rather than trying to make them stay forever you can just love them while they are here, with you." He knew how to convince her.

    "Yes, I know that too. But what about the void they leave behind? All that sadness comes to you in the middle of night, those memories, they moist your eyes and songs hit you like never before." She stared into his eyes.

    "The more people that you let into your life, the more that can just walk right out." Feel this?

    "Yesssss. So you are saying I should shut that door and don't let anyone come in?" She got up and again started watching clouds out of window.

    "Can you really do that?"

    "No. I've tried, but as you know that was a big failure."

    "There you have your answer. That's the thing about us humans and that is the price we have to pay for all the happiness that we steal from our lives. It's like everything comes with its pros and cons. And when pros like me are so much tempting that you forget the cons comes with it." He hugged her from behind.

    "Haha. Damn you, you really are the funny one here." She laughed and kissed his forehead.

    - Rutvik


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  • risingdrop 103w


    Once there was a life
    around you, within you,
    you could feel it in your bones,
    that thrill to see what future holds for you,
    ready to break every rule out there like a rebel,
    trying to be like those characters from a movie,
    always smiling,
    singing songs with your friends,
    dancing with strangers you meet on a road.
    There was nothing to fear about,
    nothing that you afraid to do, there was someone,
    walking side by side with you,
    two different footprints leading to the same path.
    Life was simple and yet you made the most out of it.

    Days turned into months and months into years,
    they say age is just a number but now you can see by yourself that it's not.
    Things have changed now,
    people have changed around you.
    There is no thrill left in you to see another day,
    another sunrise,
    you feel like you are just a burden on your kids,
    medicines are the constant items in your menu,
    walks have become lonely,
    those other footprints are no longer there to give you a company,
    she gave up long before you could tell her enough times that how much grateful you are,
    for she made this journey so beautiful and a little easy to travel,
    to tell her one last time how much you love her when she wears gajra for you.

    You know it's not possible now,
    but still you wish for just one day,
    no words, no signs,
    nothing to say,
    just you and her,
    sitting there,
    witnessing one of the most pleasant endings,
    one last sunset.

    - Rutvik


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  • risingdrop 104w

    Dear Pia,

    Yes, this is happening, you read it right Rancho, it's not for you but for Pia. So now please hand it over to her. Done? Okay, so how are you doing Pia? I hope you are doing good. This letter? yes, I wrote it especially for you, to let you know how much I adored you then. Yes, I know, it's a bit late but tumne vo to suna hi hoga, 'Better late than never.'

    Of course, I love those 3 idiots, that was one of the best trios that I have ever seen in my life, except perhaps me, my bed and sleep, just kidding. *laughs* But then you came in out of nowhere, wearing that pink saree, with your nerdy glasses and that 18th-century watch. That's where it was all started, wasn't it? That watch became a cupid and brought our Rancho to you. But first, like any other Indian girl you ignored that free-ki-advise and went to your dad and put our idiots into a big trouble.

    That day, I don't believe it was just a coincidence that you saw Rancho and millimeter and you ran to him just so that you can shout on him. And when Rancho gave his another demo you finally gave in and realized that Suhash was never meant for you. Just like Rancho, I loved the way you said 'Gadhe' to him on his face, that was so gutsy of you. I know it wasn't just your Hippocratic oath that drawn you to help him but it's in your nature to help others.

    There, In that hospital you witnessed for the first time that our beloved Rancho is softy after all and that his friends are very important to him. And when he instantly recognized that it was your mother's watch and asked you whether you were missing her on your sister's wedding, I could see that you guys had a moment there. And I was right, you did fall in love with him because "aaj mausam ek dum saaf hai par agar aapko pyaar hua hai to aap par halki halki baarish hogi."

    When Rancho confessed his love for you that night in your room you were so happy. I know that idiot took four years to say that, but vo 22 minutes tumhari Zindagi ke bhi sabse haseen 22 minutes the, haina? And just like him, you went to his hostel, though it was for the sake of Raju. Sach batana ki uss raat tumne 2 lagayi thi ya 4? Has anyone ever told you that you are damn cute when you are drunk?

    That night, you couldn't keep it inside, so you stormed out all the things you were hiding from your dad for so long. I can understand how hard it must have been for you to say all those things to your dad, to tell him that he was the reason for his son's death, to hand him over that suicide note that your brother wrote. But trust me, you did the right thing and you are a really good daughter because it's our duty to correct our parents whenever they are wrong.

    One thing I want ask here is that, I know that idiot Rancho left you without saying anything and it was your right to move on, or at least pretend that you have moved on, but still Suhash?... I mean really?...Why Pia Why? But thanks to our Raju and Farhan you were saved at the last moment. And I must say again, it was really gutsy of you to run away from that wedding, in front of everyone, in front of your dad. But again, you did the right thing.

    And last but not least, you are a damn good sister Pia, damn good. It was really frustrating and there was no way anybody else would have thought what you thought. You didn't lose your nerves and did everything that you could have done in that situation. Of course Rancho took care of things, but it was because of you that our 'Champ' survived.

    Finally, finally you kissed him, that idiot, to prove him "naak bich me nahi aati" and what a kiss it was. You guys were made for each other and totally deserved that happy ending.
    By the way, "Shadi ke baad surname change ki ya nahi?"

    In the end, being a gujarati I just want you to know that "hamare khane ki item ka sirf naam hi khatarnak hota hai baki 'Dhokla' to tum bhi nahi bhula paayi thi." *laughs*


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  • risingdrop 106w

    Dear Amrita,

    So how do I start this? This letter that I urged to write after seeing you behind that silver screen, this letter that is also a way of me thanking you for teaching me a small but very important lesson of life. You know, when I saw you for the first time, I could only see a good wife, a caring daughter-in-law and a happy daughter in you and I assumed that this is what you truly are, this is what makes you happy. I could see that you had a passion for dancing but then like any other member of this Indian society I thought it was just your past, that it was something that you were just fond of, that your priority is changed now and your only source of happiness is your family now. And somewhere you made yourself believe it too.

    But that night, that night changed everything, or should I say, that night brought the truth in front of you. That slap wasn't just a slap, was it? It was a reminder for you, a reminder to see all those unfair things that you have been ignoring for so long, things that you should have opposed, or maybe you should have asked answers for. I know that it wasn't your fault because that's what women had been doing before you raised your voice, that's what your grandma taught to your mom and your mom taught to you, to let go. "Jane do ye to hota rehta hai, thoda bardasht karna sikhna chahiye aurton ko." You couldn't understand how no one told him that it was his fault, how everyone just assumed ke ye to chalta hai, ye to normal hai, har pati patni ke bich itna to hota hi hai.  

    The way you said, "Just a slap, par nahi maar sakta" I could feel chill in my bones, like something awakened within me that was buried since forever. I wanted to scream so loud with you, "yes, it was wrong, he had no right to do it, not even one slap". People around you tried to convince you not to break your marriage because of just one slap. When Netra said "Hamein hi jod kar rakhna padta hai." and you replied, "Jod ke rakhni padi koi cheez toh matlab tooti huyi hai na? aur kab tak, kab tak jod kar rakhoge? kabhi na kabhi to thak jaoge na?" These lines shook me, completely.

    I understand what you were trying to say when you told him that you don't love him anymore. You just wanted two things from your life, respect, and happiness. But when he slapped you that night, you realized one thing, that there was no respect for you in his eyes, that he just loved his wife, not you and thought he could do anything with his wife because he loved her and he had a right to slap you, that it was just a mistake, nothing more.

    When you doubted yourself for a second, your father asked you whether you are doing all this just on a whim, or is it because you are listening to your inner voice, and then you said that it's your inner voice screaming for you that it is right whatever you are doing. So he told you, "Kai baar sahi karne ka result happy nahi hota." And I could clearly see on your face that you weren't happy too, that you also didn't want to leave what you had, your home, your mother-in-law, but you also couldn't let it go that feeling, that feeling of not being respected.

    Dear Amrita, as you said, that petition was just for a slap, a slap that wasn't his right. But Amrita I want you to know that that petition became much more for others, for women it became a symbol of strength, something which inspired them to stand up against all the unfair things that they were ignoring, they realized that there is no need to suppress their feelings, their hobbies. For men, it came as a reminder, a reminder that it is written nowhere that he can raise a hand on his wife or a woman in general.

    Amu, now I know that blue was never your favorite color but it was always yellow, and you dreamed of becoming many things in your childhood but housewife was never one of them. You tried your best to become the world's best wife, but not at the cost of your self-respect.


    // Thappad is a must watch movie. Go and watch it in case if you haven't already. //


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  • risingdrop 106w

    // Yah mera satya hai. Agar aap ko lagta hai ki yahan kahi par bhi aapka zikr hua hai to mujhe maaf kare par aapko sudhar jana chahiye. //

    @rhapsodist Kuch tippani karna chahoge aap bhi is satya par?

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    There are people, people who believe they are writers, some self-proclaimed philosophers, who explain truths of life. Sometimes all it takes is a line, a simple sentence, but sometimes, sometimes they have to go beyond their limits, crossing all the boundaries, putting some extra efforts they write two lines, two whole lines. Put some more effort and boom it's rhyming now.

    A dish of greatest truth is ready, now whom to serve it. Ohh here we go, searching another one from the same breed. You taste mine and I'll taste yours. You appreciate mine and I'll appreciate yours.

    "But that is not really your I guess, I read this same truth somewhere with simple words. Maybe you should not put your name there."

    "Aye, don't worry about it mate, nobody will notice and even if they notice there are plenty of them who are just like us."

    But, how will they bring other people to their holy walls of truths? Well, they have some tricks that works for them. How about we start with the lamest of all, known as begging in normal world. Then there are some smart ones, evolved ones, Using label of motivator they promote crap, yeah literally crap. Hoping that newbies will make them their godfathers and godmothers.

    "But isn't that a good thing to motivate people to write something better?"

    "Of course it is. But sometimes being a good WRITER you must know which things you should appreciate and which you shouldn't. Just because you are friends with them that doesn't mean you should always appreciate their shit too. Be a good friend and tell them on their faces that this isn't a poetry."

    - Rutvik