sunshine13

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A vibrant mess of wonderfully confused thoughts.. Wild hair and a heartbeat..!! Looking for untold stories in unlived places..

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  • sunshine13 62w

    Don't ever meet me in the library!
    I say do not!!

    Because I might spend all my time, looking at all the old and worn books, rummaging between the pages,
    Searching through words, the words I wish to speak.
    You will have to sit by my side and help me find that one book

    And when I do, I will read out loud everything it says and somewhere in the middle of this,
    I will sneak in some of my own words, telling you things I might not have said otherwise..

    But then sometimes I think if any book ever written can even remotely describe anything I feel or everything I wanna say to you .
    And that is why,
    Let's not meet in a library...!

    Meet me somewhere which is not in between the lines of those pages or somewhere between the spaces of words..
    Someplace where the pages have not been drenched by tears and where the spines of the books haven't been broken..

    Maybe meet me somewhere where I won't need words..!!

    - Ankita

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    So maybe meet me somewhere,
    where

    I won't need words..!

  • sunshine13 103w

    We have become the type of
    Strangers,
    That know each other by name,
    And touch,
    And taste,
    And love
    And loss..

    To end up shelved,
    In the back of each other's mind,
    Expecting to be forgotten!

    Only to be remembered more...
    Each day,everyday!

    Was love ever easy?
    Or unloving someone will??

    -Ankita

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    We,
    have become
    the type of

    Strangers,

    Expecting
    to be forgotten,

    Only to be
    remembered more...

    Each day,
    everyday!

    -Ankita

  • sunshine13 110w

    There are times when a sense of longing sits besides me, asking me a way to find you and all I tell her is that you have become a stranger now..
    There are no more words left, no more ways in which I can let you know that you did mean the world to me, still do..! No more questions to ask, when the greatest answer lies in the silence that stretches between us now..
    I don't know how you closed doors of every home we lived and every dream we dreamt..
    I never knew distance could be so evil, how it could make love stay, even when we don't!
    How it could haunt me by being a reminder of all the things that I could not hold close to me.. Especially you!!
    How goodbyes don't hurt now, but the silence between them do!!

    - Ankita

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    How Goodbyes
    don't hurt now,

    but the Silence
    between them do!!

    -Ankita

  • sunshine13 112w

    It's been tough,
    A bit hectic..
    One knock , after another ..
    Closing doors,
    Blocking memories..
    Some laughter, other cries..!


    But darling,
    One day,
    A love will arrive at your front door
    And it will have the right address..!
    One day!!


    - Ankita

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    But darling,
    One day,

    A love

    will arrive
    at your
    front door

    And it will have

    the right
    address..!


    - Ankita

  • sunshine13 114w

    Made love
    To alot of
    Forgetful women..
    Or maybe I just have
    A bad memory!

    In any case,
    Strange skin
    Does very little
    To soothe
    My strange heart..
    But don't worry,
    I am still trying!

    And as I lay here,
    In the morning,
    staring at a spider on my ceiling ,
    Only he
    And I, both know..
    I'm not scared of the world..
    I'm only lonely for it..!!

    -Ankita

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    I'm not

    Scared
    of the world..

    I'm only

    Lonely
    for it..!!

    -Ankita

  • sunshine13 114w

    There's always somethings that we leave..
    Unsaid!!
    And we would always stand there,
    Late at night,
    Longer than we needed to,
    Hoping that either of us is courageous enough to just say, or feel..
    But instead we ask,
    What's up? What's next?
    Didn't you find someone?

    After all this time?

    You'd keep looking at me,
    And I, at you , contemplating all the right and wrongs, or the if and buts..

    But then one day, I hope we meet..
    letting the if and buts
    slowly fade away with the smoke..
    I will trace all the wild things I want to do
    with you and
    to you..
    And you will kiss me repeatedly
    as I try to leave..

    After all this time?

    Oh comeon, why not..
    Always!!

    - Ankita

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    After all this time?

    Oh comeon,
    why not..

    Always!!

    - Ankita

  • sunshine13 115w

    I have stopped waiting
    For this to begin
    For you to say things,
    That you actually mean
    And for me to try to give up
    On something I can't even name!

    I do not know where we stand,
    When you kiss the truth out of me,
    Making me weak in my knees
    When you whisper good night,
    While calling yourself a friend,
    not more!
    And all the times you make me realise,
    That I'm not suitable for you..
    Can't I just ask,
    If I'm a joke to you?

    I do not know if this is where
    We are supposed to be,
    This place with no clarity.
    You know,
    I have stopped expecting,
    and waiting for answers,
    For forevers and always..
    For you to look at me,
    And tell me
    If I mean something, anything?

    We have loved..
    And then we lost..!
    All we have is..
    Now,
    this moment
    Something real and worth
    So seize it
    Before I let go!
    For
    Forever!!

    - ankita

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    All we have is..
    Now,
    This moment
    Something
    real and worth
    So seize it
    Before I let go!
    For
    Forever!!

    - Ankita

  • sunshine13 115w

    "So why do you hide yourself around people ?
    Why do you pretend like you don't care and somethings don't hurt you at all,when I know they do! " Aisha asks me as I continue to sip my coffee..

    I take a long breath, look at her and reply , " People out there don't really want the truth.. They only believe what they want from that particular person for that particular time.. So if I behave according to your expectations, you would never leave me.. But if I don't, maybe you would..!
    I have been burned too many times Aisha to care to put myself out there again. "

    "What do you actually mean? " she always wanted to know more..

    "I mean, Some people came to me for my honesty, but soon left saying I was too rude..
    Some people came searching for love, soon turning away with dissapointments ..
    Some people came close appreciating my talents, soon drifting away with jealousy..
    They say this is a mistake..
    I made my life out of the people I loved and lost..
    So, tell me..
    Who would ever love the real me? And why? "

    She didn't say a word, just held my hand, and hummed slowly placing her head on my shoulder.
    Then slightly lifted her head and looked at me, " I believe you Aahan!
    And I would want to love the real you"

    I looked out onto the stars thinking about all the times I had given away pieces of me to the people who didn't care.. And then , I had this one person, besides me, who cared, who wanted to love me, with everything I had.. All my failures, all my laughter and all the annoying things I do.. ! So I kissed her.. !!

    And yet , despite everything , here we were searching for a little love in this dimly lit room.
    Afterall,
    You need love to heal what you lost in love!
    Don't you?

    - Ankita

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    Afterall,
    You need

    Love

    to heal
    what you

    Lost in
    Love!


    -Ankita

  • sunshine13 117w

    Stop.
    Stop right there,
    Don't go in for the kiss..
    Keep staring at me,
    Please..
    For I have never felt more needed,
    than I do in the story
    playing out in your eyes..!!

    -Ankita

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    Stop.

    Stop
    right there,
    Don't go
    in for
    the kiss..

    Keep
    staring
    at me..!

    -Ankita

  • sunshine13 117w

    I lie here,
    Fallen..
    You lie there,
    Unsure!!
    You are too afraid to say things, and I have seen that in your eyes. That deep ocean, the endless thinking.. I don't quite comprehend it. What exactly does this mean?
    Does it lie in the way you sit close to me, pulling me closer, staring at me, like you really feel lucky to have me?
    Does it lie in the way you make me smile and let your cologne be my favourite scent, something I keep searching when I come back home?
    Or is it the way you go back, re-read our texts or sometimes visit my profile or call me suddenly saying I love you, 7 times a day?
    Or is it the way you try to understand me quietly in ways nobody ever did before
    Or the way you lean on my shoulder during our metro rides, or during the long cuddles, intertwining your fingers with mine, like you never want to let go?

    So tell me, is this what you call love, because I do!
    No, I'm not unsure.. And I'm not even asking you a question..
    I just want to hear you say it!

    -Ankita

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    So tell me,
    is this what you call
    Love,

    because I do!
    No, I'm not unsure.
    I just want
    to hear
    you say it!

    -Ankita